Need some wise words from the collective mumsnet council
I?ve recently been seeing a new man (about 4 months) it started out as nothing more than a quick shag, but as we were already friends it?s grown rather quickly into a relationship.
I see him about once a week, I would love to see him more, but trying to arrange a sitter for DD can be difficult, and I have also recently started a new job which involves a 4 hour commute each day as well as a large number of evening events I need to attend. So for me the precious 30 minutes I get to see DD before she goes to bed is very important to me, because I already feel I?m doing a crap job as a parent as I?m there so infrequently during the week.
Sorry to supply what probably seems like random info but I wanted to give a bit of back story.
So everything is going well and we?re all happy, and I was planning to go see him this evening, but due to last minute important work commitments I?ve had to cancel on him this morning.
And this is where I start to worry, he?s rather upset and sent me a couple of stroppy texts saying how disappointed he is in me. As a one off I can understand/ forgive that, but then I think back to a few years ago when we almost went out a few times, but I couldn?t get any free time and again he used the ?I?m disappointed in you? line, which really got my back up and I backed away completely and it took us over a year to actually rebuild our friendship.
Now I?m probably being overly sensitive because it was something my SBXH used to say a lot particularly when trying to control me for example ?I?m disappointed you feel you need friends outside of our relationship?, ?I?m disappointed that you feel you can share things about our relationship with your friends? (or have a job, have independent hobbies, basically want to do anything on my own)
So am I being paranoid, is he just expressing that he really would like to see me (in maybe not the best way ? given he knows my issues with SBXH) or should I be seeing a small warning signal?