In my case I was the DH... I use to go to work at 7 in the morning, and try to be home by 6.30. Depending on what happened at work, most nights I was able to be home by 7 at the latest. It was a long day, and most of the time, because of my work, I came home completely mentally drained, although I use to enjoy the travel home to try and at least recover.
I use to cook every meal at night, even though, DW demanded dinner for her be put on the table by 7.30, which drastically cut into the time I use to spend with our DS, which to this day I resented, as basically didn't get any time to spend with him. I, to be honest would have rather have spent time with our DS, and then cook dinner after he was put in bed.
I use to bath our DS every night, and put him to bed, unless of course I was working late, which happened maybe once or twice a month, but unfortunately the times that it did happen they were completely unavoidable. Being 2IC, you have responsibilities, and also the pay packet to go along with it, which is often ignored.
I use to then take care of all the odd jobs around the house, including doing the gardening and mowing, which does take time, but also needs to be done.
DW's parents use to come down every day and do everything else, they would come after I had left, and leave before I came home, and DW use to pretend that she had done it herself.
The thing it comes down to as well, is the other partner picking up on things that need doing. Some partners have different tolerance levels and perceptions on when things should be done. I.e noticing when things need a vacuum etc, or the washing needs to be put on. It is all about allocating jobs, sticking with them. I tend to believe if the other partner has a low tolerance level for something, then, they become responsible for it, within reason of course and of course if the jobs are spread fairly, and evenly. There is little point in arguing over the fact that you noticed it first, and getting upset because the other partner hasn't picked up or done anything about what is concerning you.
Ask yourself this question though.... if the roles were reversed, (which they could be) what would you expect? Unfortunately such reversal is harder to implement, if there is a massive differential in pay between what the two partners separately could achieve. It is a difficult one that is for sure.
The thing is though, both sides have a role to play. While one partner stays at home, and the other goes to work, who can assume that the partner who works actually likes going to work, rather than staying at home. Both things can suck at times, and at the same time, (hopefully at least equally if not more) they have their bonuses.
Think about what you would expect, and try and give it a go if you can. Otherwise there is just going to be resentment, and that doesn't get you anywhere.