xp's wife is slagging me off to my daugher

[slinksanta]

broke up with the kids dad a long time he took me to court for custody 2 years ago he left court with parental responsibilty and an access aggreement.

so things have not been very good with in in terms of communications since he met his lawyer wife. he see's them every other weekend and 3 weeks in summer and 1 week at easter and 2 extra days tagged onto weekend if half term, and 1 week at xmas, and bank holidays!
Yes far too much!!!

anyway back to the point- my dd, 6, told me last night that the wife said that i was really ugly because i had dreadlocks and piercings. she was apparently talking to dd and not an overheard conversation. I am gutted to think that when the kids are there she says stuff like this to them. surely this would be illegal if it was a rasist comment!!
do i have to put up with this type of thing? its upseting to think that my kids are growing up being told that their mummy is ugly and i expect other things!
what shall i do?

dont send them at all
go and see solicitor asap and get legal advice
wou;ldnt this be classed as emotional abuse towards your children

how do you know it is true though? children can stir things.

Not saying that she is but they can make things up, espcially if they think it will cause trouble or get them attention.

why do you think that your x has far too much access? Is the contact with their father damaging the children?

Much as I disapprove of the wife making disparaging comments, doubt if there is anything you can do about it, except ignore. If you have to say something, next time your dd passes on something the wife has said, why don't you say, "Really? She said that? Well what do you think?" I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

well i only think he gets too much contact because organising holidays and seeing family with the kids is impossible, they seem to have more holiday time there, so when it comes to seeing my family its a nightmare. take this xmas, they will be at there dads house until the 2nd jan and cannot get to see family until 14th jan and then i am unsure whether it is his or my contact weekend. just makes it really hard for the kids to see their family unless i take them out of school.

I might get an appointment with a solicitor just for some advice, they will probably suggest i leave it though