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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Any good books on how to recover from emotional abuse?

5 replies

toptramp · 02/10/2011 19:07

I have the Lundy Bancroft book "Why does he do that?" which has been very useful in making me examine my decisions but I need something on how to get over a seriously damaging relationship.
I have had cbt and to be honest I don't really feel like seeing another councellor. I would really like a book with some excersises and lots of positive/helpful/kind advice. Any suggestions?
I went to my sister's wedding and it was so lovely and I feel so happy for her but it bought up my own relationship baggage. I want a decent relationship but first I must heal.

OP posts:
Jellykat · 02/10/2011 20:09

I don't know of any other good books i'm afraid, but i can highly recommend a new course run by Womens Aid, called 'The Recovery toolkit', it's free and runs once a week for 12 weeks.

Whereas 'The Freedom Programme' focuses on the Abuse, this is the next step focusing on you and moving forward.. It covers raising Self Esteem, Assertiveness and Setting Boundaries, Healthy Relationships etc...It was life changing for me as i now see things so differently.

If you get in touch with your local WA, they can tell you more for your local area. Good luck Smile

HerHissyness · 02/10/2011 20:14

OOh, I have the Freedom Programme tomorrow, I'll ask about the Recovery Toolkit!

ItsMeAndMyPuppyNow · 02/10/2011 20:15

Look up Beverly Engel on Amazon: she has several titles on recovery from abuse.

It is likely that you were in an abusive relationship because of the relationship model your parents presented you with, and the way they treated you as a child. So you may also want to read books on EA parents, and on inner child recovery, to heal primal emotional wounds. Susan Forward and John Bradshaw have written recommended books on those subjects.

Jellykat · 02/10/2011 21:01

It's a fairly new course so fingers crossed they're running it near you HH, having said that i finished it in July and live in the back of beyond - So they bloomin' well should do! Smile

I and the some of the others who completed The Freedom Programme once, just felt that we didn't want or need to discuss our XPs anymore.

Where some of the women returned to The FP, we felt we were ready to concentrate on the rest of our lives and its absolutely given us 'the tools' to do it. There's a lot of handouts to keep and always refer back to, and brilliant homework like doing 3 things nice for yourself each week - something one can easily not bother, or find time, to do! Grin

TimeForMeIsFree · 02/10/2011 21:08

I found Getting Past Your Past very helpful and quite empowering as it didn't take me back to the depths of the abuse.

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