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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I being unreasonable?

10 replies

cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:23

Last night {Thursday} in our village there was a 'Christmas Celebration' concert which I had been asked to perform at with my Dad. My DH and I had also been asked to take part in a sketch which we were given scrpits for but told we didn't need to learn lines etc - just read. On Wednesday night DH called me and said that he had been told that he had an important darts match on Thu night which clashed with the concert and as he is the Vice Captain of the team he should be there - I reminded him of his commitment to te sketch but he asked me to call the minister who was organising the night and apologise that he could no longer make it. I did this grudgingly and the minister said he would just have to find a willing audience member to take part. I was also a little worried about how my MIL would cope with my 2 year old and almost 1 year old in the audience when my Dad and I were singing. Anyway Thursday night came and just before my brother arrived to collect DH for darts there was a phone call to say that the match had been cancelled...I thought that since the original plan was to go to the concert, my husband would them come along but no....he went to the pub anyway because he didn't want to let my brother down! What about letting the minister down? What about letting me down? He seemed to think I was being totally unreasonable...do you?

OP posts:
cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:41

anybody? please?

OP posts:
colditz · 16/12/2005 10:42

No, I think you shouldn't let him get away with this. Let him down for something he considers important.

feastofsteven · 16/12/2005 10:43

No. He could go to the pub with his brother on so many other nights.

hunkermunker · 16/12/2005 10:44

Don't think it was because he didn't want to let your brother down - it was because he wanted a night in the pub. As for making you make his apologies for him to the minister - does he normally behave older than seven?

cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:44

Thank you colditz - the way he was going on you'd think I was being horribly mean! I was just really disappointed.

OP posts:
cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:46

Yes - exactly - he just wanted to go to the pub! That is what i said to him! He denied it! And yes he does often act like a child! His mum used to do everything for him!

OP posts:
Sleighmenere · 16/12/2005 10:46

No you are not being unreasonable but you shouldn't have rung the minister for him.

cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:47

I know -I am ashamed of my pathetic attempts to avoid an argument

OP posts:
cathyspamtaslittlehelper · 16/12/2005 10:49

Thank you all btw - I just wanted the knowledge in myself that I wasn't just being mean and unreasonable! Feel better now

OP posts:
COPPERfeelunderSantasTOP · 16/12/2005 11:29

You're not being unreasonable IMHO. It was bad enough that he put the darts match before his commitment to you. Getting you to do his dirty work for him in phoning the minister was unforgiveable. Still going to the pub when the match was cancelled would have led to the front door being locked and bolted all night, I'm afraid.

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