faking orgasms

[bbface]

It is an odd situation, as I really do enjoy sex with my DH but over the course of our 5 year relationship... I would say I have orgasmed 5 times and all in early months.

The only way to really 'prove' to DH that I am enjoying myself is to fake orgasm. I enjoy the intimacy, I enjoy the physical sensation, quite often I initiate sex, I just do not orgasm - yet I lead DH to think I do 99% of the time. No point discussing it

What are other people's experience like re. this issue? Do you ever fake it? If so, how frequently?

Well DP and I generally have great sex. I guess I am one of the lucky ones to be able to orgasm through penetrative sex. I probably orgasm about 85% of the times we have sex.

But, I still fake it some of the other times. Usually if I'm just not in the right frame of mind, or am preoccupied by something or whatever. It's just easier than breaking the mood to explain to DP that he doesn't have to "wait" for me, and going into the reasons why etc etc.

Also I agree with what another poster earlier said about faking it to help get her in the mood. It sounds weird but I totally know what you mean! Sometimes I get carried away with myself and I'm pretty sure DP thinks I've orgasmed when I haven't. On those occasions I haven't exactly consciously faked it, just got a little prematurely...vocal... ;-)

Oops, hit post too early.

Anyway, OP - I wondered if you have orgasmed more with previous partners, or not, and thus used to enjoy sex more? If that's the case, I'd think you owe it to yourself to try to get things a little better between you and DH. If not...well orgasming isn't important to everyone, and I do agree that sex can still be enjoyable without. So if you're genuinely happy to continue like that, why not. But really, what have you got to lose by telling your DH you want to experiment more, try out some new stuff or whatever...no need to admit you've been faking it all these years, just see what happens if you try out a few new things.

It's not always obvious to a man when a woman orgasms, in my experience anyway, especially if you've got children in the house and are trying to keep the noise down.

I'm pretty sure my DW doesn't fake it, because she'll let me know not to wait for her if she's not getting there - we're very honest and open, which is the key (for us) to happy sex. To feel fully satisfied she needs to come twice, once by fingers/oral and once by penetration (which usually works 90% of the time for her). Then it's my turn. Occasionally she takes medicine which seems to desensitise her and stops her from coming, but she still enjoys the closeness of sex. Fortunately that's quite a rare occurrence.

You've been together 5 years and always fake orgasm and it's his fault????

You need to take responsibility for your own orgasm.

If you're faking it, it seems to me fair for him to think you are having an orgasm

UNLESS YOU TELL HIM

It'll only get better if you BOTH take responsibility for your orgasms.

Tell him what does it for you and show him. If you don't know spend some time alone and find out for yourself what does it for you, maybe even get a vibrator to help you work it out.

BUT you then have to tell / show him and even when he's there take responsibility for it.

Sorry to be so blunt.