So so p***** off with DP right now? Should I be?

[wewishyouamerryKITTYmas]

DP is staying away tonight as he is on a course with work. So all week I have had "I don't want to go away" "I will have my phone on all the time etc etc" as I am 35 weeks pregnant.

So tonight he doesn't phone me until 9.50pm I phoned him 3 times since 8.30am and his phone has rung out and gone onto voicemail.

Then he phones and is all weird I asked him why he hadn't answered his phone and he said "he didn't know" also asked him where he had been all night and he said "nowhere" his answers were all over the place and I suspect he has been drinking (he has an alcohol problem and hasn't had a drink for 3 months).

I'm so at him, do I send him a stroppy e-mail for him to find tomorrow. I said to him on the phone "since this phonecall is not making any sense I see no point in continuing it so I will speak to you in the morning when you are less tired!"

argh men!!!!!!

I can see why your so angry and I would have ended the conversation as well. I can also understand why you want to send him a stroppy e-mail, but would it make anything better? Maybe you should just wait to talk to him tomorrow.

Hope it all works out.

SK hun hugs to you. Of course you havea right to be angry. I would be totally peeved especially if he has a drink problem and has used the night away to go out drinking. What if you had gone into labour etc what would he have done then.

Now STOP ... lets be the voice of reason .... perhaps he feels that this is his one chance to be irresponsible??
Perhaps ( like most men ) he has some anxiety about the arrival of a new baby - and he feels that once he gets home - he has to be dependable and raliable.

Give the poor bloke a bit of slack .... until h proves me wrong

Dont send any stroppy emails.

So hes been to the bar with a few colleagues, as long as its a one off (given the previous problems), its not worth going on about.

You are only 35 weeks pg. You are unlikely to go into labour, so dont see that as an issue, other than you are slighly more likely to get tetchy about your DH having a night away.

Dont mean to sound harsh but I think you need to calm down and look at it again.

OK I know I don't know he has been drinking but everything points to it tonight. But he has been the one going on and on about how worried he was about staying out and how he was not going to let the phone out his sight then he goes and does this?

Have sent him an e-mail retelling the conversation but also saying if you haven't been drinking then I apologise profusely but you know if anything were to happen to me tonight you know how dangerous it could be if I cannot contact you(I have no friends or family in this area).

What really gets me is if he cannot get ahold of me for 10 minutes he tells me off as he thinks something bad has happened!!

Hi SK,
I've had a similar conversation with my DP this evening as he decided that despite me being 37 wks p/g he would have a drink in town therefore be unable to drive or help me in any way if anything starts.

I'm leaving things til morning so hopefully he can see why I might be a bit upset / disappointed by him rather than risk a bit of hormonal rant from me!

I think that once they get away from the house they just feel the need to chill a bit. I guess looking at it from their point of view we do rely on them for quite a lot of support & it must be nice to be able to let go occasionally. They also do seem to manage to leave their brains somewhere else once they have a drink though.

I really dont think its that bad. The email will not do anything to improve the situation that I believe you are blowing up out of proportion, unless, he is always like this?

I went into labour at 35 weeks. Sorry Sweetkitty don't want to scare you tho'

Wouldn't worry when they work away they always over indulge, I have found anyway

No he's not always like this but you don't want to know what happened the last time he went for a drink after work.

DP cannot just have a few drinks he has to get completely and utterly slaughtered to the point where he puts himself in dangerous situations (i.e. thinking me can walk home even though it's 30 miles away and gets mugged etc). Anyway after the last incident he decided he was going to give up alcohol before something really bad happened and so far he has. I wouldn't care if he had had a few sociable drinks after work if he wasn't like this.

The thing I'm so annoyed with is for about the past 2 weeks he has been going on and on about not wanting to go away in case something happens and I have been the one saying "go I'll be fine!" (DD was 37 weeks and a 4 hours labour so he worried about that too). He's been driving me up the wall about being contactable.

I know I'm thinking chill it's the hormones!

George - another pregnant lady stressing, I know men they just don't get it sometimes.

OK, youve been saying 'Go, I'll be fine'.

He is a bloke.

He will take you literally.

He will not understand why you are so upset.

Remember, you said you would be fine, and you are really. Relax, go to bed with some chocolate or something.

SK, they sound so similar, my DP used to have "adventures" too. (trekking through fields of horses dressed in a suit, stories of dodgy mugging cab drivers immediately spring to mind!)
I'm not going to have a go at my DP for going out at all but I do want him to commit to arranging some kind of back up plan if he intends going out drinking. It is quite scary when you run through what might happen, I think it's just a case of getting them to understand the concerns.

George my DP's adventures have got him into serious trouble so they are not funny drunken I ended up in a field stories (I so wish they were).

I hope you make him sleep on the sofa when he comes in too and make him feel guilty therefore pamper you this weekend.

I'm off to bed now thanks for all the comments ladies sometimes it's just nice to get different opinions on things.

I'd be pissed off too. But I wouldn't make a huge thing of it were it not for the drinking issue. Actually, I'm lying, if I was 35 weeks pregnant I'd be making a HUGE thing of it. But it wouldn't be an entirely rational thing to do, IYSWIM.

With the drinking issue, I'm sure you are quite right to be very angry, and very worried.

Don't send him the stroppy e-mail. He said he didn't want to go away, do you think he knew he might have a drink if he were away? I think try and be supportive, even though it is highly frustrating.

Well he phoned this morning and apparently he got into the hotel and fell asleep and got up and banged his head on the shower door, then he phoned me so that's why he was a bit all over the place on the phone!

Mmm don't quite believe him but what can you do give him hte benefit of the doubt and get on with it (he did say he wouldn't drink as I'm far too pregnant)!

Thanks for the advice as ever

Morning SK, ah well, lets hope that he gets your concerns and doesn't have any more incidents.

Didn't see my DP before he went off to work but he gets it and has apologised profusely on an e-mail and promised to be an A1 supporter from now on.

Good stuff george you make sure you milk it.