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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Im pissed off with my sister & mums agressive and dysfunctional attitude and how its rubbing off on my little neice.

7 replies

justhe1 · 28/08/2011 16:14

My mum just constantly tells my niece (8) to sut up, your getting on my nerves, stop being a brat etc.
BUT as well, my mother hates ALL children, claims to adore my niece (WTF) and has nothing nice to say about any other family or friends kids, and that is evident in my niece who is scathing when asked any thing about other kids in the family eg have you seen XX recently...says stuff like " NO, Thank god, they are brats".

My dad has invited dn next Sunday to play & for lunch. Dn says i do not want to go bcuase grandad is always saying "would you like this, that & the other and it gets on my nerves, im sick of him".

My dad is lovely with dn. and always invites her to play to spend time with her. He finds her behaviour difficult allot of the time...she is a mirror image of my mum & sister.

Its just so uncalled for and ugly in a little girl.

My sister also has nothing good to say and openely critizises every one in front of dn.

Nasty nasty nasty.
I always bite my tongue, but today i tried to gently say that grandad is only being kind because he loves her, so she should not be unkind. She looked sheepish so maybe she understands, i dont know.

Poor thing.
I cant do or say anything becuase they are not approachable people, but why can they not see that this will affect dn's future relationships if she is not taught to try to see some good in people.

OP posts:
M0naLisa · 28/08/2011 16:27

Christ are you me? lol. sounds like my family apart from the dad bit.

Thumbwitch · 28/08/2011 16:30

Do you see much of her? All you can do really is what you already are doing - model better behaviour than her mum and grandmother and make her think about what she is saying, rather than just parrotting their phrases.

I don't blame you for being pissed off about it though - it's not nice to see those attitudes in small children (or anyone else, obviously)

justhe1 · 28/08/2011 16:30

I have never ever come across anyone who has family like this.....M0na, are yours like this then?

OP posts:
justhe1 · 28/08/2011 16:32

I see her maybe twice a month, i try tohave her over to ours and show her by example that there are other ways, beofre its too engrained within her.

OP posts:
M0naLisa · 28/08/2011 16:34

My sister and mum are like this. my mum favours my eldest DS more, DS2 is 3.5 and still a 'baby' to my mum.

Sister is a nasty piece of work, shes ok in small doses but when shes ina mood i try to avoid the best i can.

justhe1 · 28/08/2011 17:12

I always have to be aware of when my sisters are "due on" because they are utterly utterly vicious to each other and people around them.

This apparently is ok and a good reason for nasty behaviour, oh and its ok that they are the way they are becuase none of them "like" kids, everybody knows that so cant expect anything else Shock wtf.

Its draining and unnaceptable and NOT ok but they will never ever change.

OP posts:
tallwivglasses · 28/08/2011 21:07

Reacting sheepishly shows promise! You can build on that by simply giving your slant on things, asking her more questions but keeping it light - and humorous when you can.

Let's hope she rebels in later years and becomes more like her auntie just - just to annoy them Smile

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