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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Pregnant and just left him

4 replies

totallygone · 28/08/2011 00:08

Hi, I'm new to mumsnet - first post. 6 weeks pregnant with 1st - unplanned, and a bit of a shock! The day after I took the test (last week) i finally managed to find the strength to leave ex-p. Having done some reading up on it since then (especially here) I've realised that his behaviour towards me was pretty straightforwardly emotionally abusive. I didn't really see it at the time, all I knew was that I was miserable, and that I couldn't cope with the way that he was treating me, and certainly not for the next 8 months when what I need to be focussing on is the pregnancy and making sure I get my uni work done early so it's done before the baby comes next April.

Trouble is I'm feeling really low right now. My family is being very supportive, but without my ex I feel really alone, and struggling to cope with all these changes. I don't want to go through this on my own, but I know I can't be with him, and I don't want to bring my child up in that kind of environment thinking that it's normal. It's really hard though, and it hurts so much, especially because I know that he is hurting too.

I don't really know what kind of response I'm hoping to get from posting this, coz I'm not really asking a quesstion. Just hoping for some messages to help me stay strong, and to see if anyone else has been in any similar situation and how they got through it. Thanks in advance for the help guys.

OP posts:
bushymcbush · 28/08/2011 00:15

Hi totallygone, sounds like you've been through some shite recently. Does your ex know about the pregnancy yet? How much contact dies he intend to have with his child?

I'm also pregnant and due in April, come and join the April thread on the ante-natal board. I'll send a link in a mo...

bushymcbush · 28/08/2011 00:18

April thread

totallygone · 28/08/2011 00:53

Hi, thanks for the link. Yes, he does know, told him as soon as I found out. I don't know about the contact. He's already got children from before and he doesn't really see them very much, so that might be an indicator. I think it depends on whether or not it's convenient, and I plan to be living quite far away from him (closer to the children he already has, by coincidence).

OP posts:
IRCL · 28/08/2011 01:02

I think you sound really strong OP.

I think you are bound to feel lonely, but it is great your family are being supportive.

Do you have any friends you could perhaps stay the night with?

Failing that, keep talking here.

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