After a very up & down 18 months last night was the final straw. My, now ex, bf has 3 sons from a previous relationship but as there was domestic violence & drug abuse inthe relationship they were taken from their mum & have lived with their maternal grandmother for the last 3 years. When i met my ex I did not know the full story & it was very much that the boys were 'lost' by his ex it is only as court action has taken place as she is trying to get them back that I have read court papers etc that make things more clear. They had broken up prior to them being removed former care & he had been caring for his dying dad but IMO that is not an excuse for abandoning your sons with a junkie & the violence & drug use on his part had occurred previously anyway. Afaik he is now clean although there have been slips according to drug tests I have found in court papers which he has asked me to read. Our relationship has been up & down but I am currently 4 months pregnant & had really been up recently. Yesterday he had court to do with his sons as he us trying to gain access & whilst there his sons social worker told him she had been informed that I am pregnant & to let me know she would be contacting me. When he told me this I was mortified, I have 2 children & am a very good mum & the thought of social services being involved in my babies life did upset me as I have never done anything wrongwith regards to my kids. When he came here later on we started to discuss this & I was obviously upset but he just said it wasn't his fault. I argued that it was hardly mine & why should I be paying because he & his ex were junkies. He was shouting at me that it wasn't his fault because he was with his dad etc & I said that he had let his boys down but he wouldn't have that & got very verbally abusive telling me I was a slag who sleeps with everyone etc. I told him to get out, it is my flat. He stays sometimes & gives me money towards his food & me doing his washing but the flat is mine, I pay all the bills etc. He was saying no give him money first & I said if he didn't leave I would call the police. He said I would have to as he wasn't leaving til he got his baby out of me. I was attacked by my ex when pregnant with my DD so this terrified me. I called 999 & managed to lock myself in the bathroom. My DD, 8, was outside with her friend & I shouted at her to go next door to friends house. He was banging on the door & shouting at me then when he heard me talking to the police went downstairs & calmly started to play football with neighbours kids so when police arrived he could make me out to be crazy pregnant woman & he was a saint. They spoke to us, I packed some if his clothes in a bag & they sent him on his way. I will have to have some contact as he has more stuff here but am going to insist he sends someone else to collect it. I have taken him back before but not this time but could do with some support right now because I just feel awful.
Thank you to anyone that has read this far, I am sorry it is so long x