Sex help please

[Dohsex]

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Pmsl. Go for it girl!!!

You've got to find your G spot! Make it your mission. Its inside and towards your tummy. I once had a boyfriend who blew my mind with finger stimulation of G spot and no clit at all. I never looked back. I can almost black out during a G spot orgasm. Thats why some find penetration works and why large wotsits are revered.
Oh geeeez, tmi!

I wonder if part of the problem is psychological? I know that sometimes I go through weird phases where I keep being on the way to orgasm then I have a sort of mental block...like I suddenly get self-conscious or something and completely snap out of just being totally within the physicality of it all, and then it takes me ages to get back to where I was. I can go for months where this doesn't happen, then a week or so where it will happen every time for no apparent reason.

I wondered about that because you said sometimes you got worried during oral sex that your DP was getting bored? If your thought patterns during sex are similar, this isn't going to help you orgasm, I'd have thought. Find a position that feels good and stimulates your clitoris (agree with previous posts that a cross between missionary and sideways is often really good) don't let your thoughts wander to whether or not your DP is bored or whether or not you will orgasm, just close your eyes and focus on the spark of pleasure you're feeling, however small, and see what happens? It's not a race...speeding up before you're ready to speed up is fatal! And 10-15 minutes to get to orgasm, even through oral sex, doesn't seem like that long to me, even if it is slower than DIY.

I think you have to be in the' zone'/right frame of mind to begin with.

Then try the following (not all at once ) - you on top, plenty of nipple stimulation (either you do this or him) or your legs straight with him on top. Basically postiions where you are getting clitoral stimulation whilst being pentrated.

HTH

Definitely agree you can train yourself into getting stimulated with penetration. I thought the only was was clitoral, that's what the books said when I started. Then one DP gave me a hint of what was possible and I spent a few months training with a vibrator to relax into an orgasm with penetration. It is a learned response, just as namechange2208 said. Now I finally understand what is good about a big willy (widish) but it doesn't take that, just stimulation in the right spot. There are also videos on the internet on how to make a women come using fingers inside if you google something like 'how to make a woman squirt'.

Wide not wid

I couldn't agree more with Sincity it's definitely down to the right frame of mind, if I'm not in the mood, something that would have had me orgasming over and over will just feel a bit crap.

You may find that you're already mentally putting yourself off sex before you eve start.

But the training thing is a good idea, my first 8 years of sex I didn't come once, but then I met a very liberated woman who taught me about vibrators and how to relax into sex and just enjoy it.

Haven't looked back since :)