GetOrfMoiSamsungFridgeFreezer ·
17/08/2011 20:54
Just a quick update to all those of you were so lovely, helpful and kind.
If you didn't see it me and DH were having problems with zero sex drive and his complete unwillingness to talk about it.
He finally unclammed - he actually was pretty heartbroken 
. He had been on anti depressants for some time (felt he couldn't tell me as I had a lot on my plate) due to feeling utterly rough and a complete failure. We have had a tough couple of years - we lost in excess of £60k when the recession hit (a contractor who owed him a lot of money went bust owing him loads) and we had to really tighten our belts badly. We are all right now but earning levels are not nearly the same (construction) and has felt he has worked for years for nothing.
Anyway, all that and he has just felt a general 'what is the point' which I never even considered because he has always been a glass half full person.
Anyway, we have finally talked about all this. I have had my own fun and games to deal with so it has not been easy at ALL. Just pressures of modern life I suppose, but at least he ha agreed we need to bloody sort it. He does love me, and we are both going to counselling separately in order to try and resolve it, if that goes well we will go to joint counselling.
He started to talk actually because I got to the end of my tether and was crying, and dd asked me what was up, and I said that I was unhappy and thinking of splitting with dp. She was utterly distraught, begged me not to split up with dp. I got very upset and spoke to dp when she had gone to bed, said that I was at the end, dd would be heartbroken, and to bloody TALK.
Since then we have been a lot better together - we are kind of making a conscious effort to do things together, and to appreciate each other. I love him very dearly and I feel, fingers crossed, that we can work this out.
Thanks to all those who listened to my ranting a couple of months ago.