workloads...

[lightsandshapes]

ok, I'm going to have a moan....

I put bins out
Usually am the one to fill and empty dishwasher (ok, always)
Cook meals in the evening
Go food shopping for big shops (DP shops for beer, milk, bread eggs, butter)
Feed the dogs in the morining
Walk the dogs the most (DP does it sometimes).
Hoover (except when DP makes a big deal he's doing it once in a blue moon).

In contrast DP
cleans up dog poo (sporadically and usually after nagging)
Chainsaws and chops some wood (sporadically)
Randomly moves furniture around in the house
Strims the garden (sporadically - I would like it to look neater).

Most nights he comes home from work, lifeboat, coanoeing course (today), lies in front of tv, smokes a cigarete, drinks a beer and falls asleep.

He doesn't take me out, buy me presents or generally make much of a fuss of me. I have to ask him for a kiss.

I work full time - he's a teacher currently on summer hols and has made a unilateral decision to go part time in December. This annoys me as well as his salary has dropped significantly, just at a time we need it. Though he never does much with his money - he's very tight.

He wasn't this lazy to begin with. I've had enough of this esp cos I'm now 6 months pregnant and starting to waddle. AIBU?

Advice please - if I start to discuss with him, he either gets defensive or switches off / pretends to fall asleep.....

I'm 34 he's 45 and seems to be 'winding down' - I don't want to be stuck with a lethargic partner for life

I'm using psychology because I'm trying really hard NOT to say "Get rid of this selfish slob before you have a real baby to take care of!"

Knew that'd bring on the laymans terms GB

...so I caved in and put the bins out. He's still in bed. Wer're hardy speaking. I've had enougt tbh.

What are you thinking, OP? Do you mean you've had enough of the relationship?

(To clarify my first sentence was meant in a kind tone rather than an accusatory one)

What is stopping you from directly addressing the issues that you have with your dh?

You have the perfect opportunity to sit down with him and discuss the fact that as you are six months pregnant and the domestic workload is patently unfair on you so, show him a list of all household jobs and ask him to look it over and put his name next to the ones he will be responsible for, not just do, but be responsible for.
Alos inform him that there will be more job sharing once baby is born and he needs to step up.
There is no harm in telling him how fed up you are and it has to change.

OP, DP is a teacher, yes? I'd say that comes with a reasonable degree of intelligence?! Ok a few minus points for being a bloke, but, on the whole, he's not stupid. I wouldn't bother telling him what I want him to do, rather what I WON'T do.

He's an adult, not a child who needs to be shown the way (unless it's the door) so let him look after himself (he's doing a great job ATM) and you look after you and bubs.

Sorry if I'm being harsh, but I lived with a completely selfish knob for so many years, I have no tolerance left. Treat him with the contempt he deserves, Selfish, lazy git!