Honest answers please...

[MascaraOHara]

If a variety of unreleated people said various things that implied they thought you and your dp had split up would you start to get worried or put it down to a weird coincidence?

I'd ask why they had that idea, What they'd heard etc. Then work from there.

TBH it would worry me

Id certainly want to know more.

It's all been something and nothing. I think I'm only relating the cases because they all happened close together.

scenarios
A young lad from my local who I don't really know that well got chatting to me a few weeks ago and kept referring to DP as my ex. I had to actually convince him that we were a couple and he seemed suprised. When I ask why did you think he was my ex. he said he'd been talking to him (dp) a while and had asked. DP assures me the conversation was before we got back together (ages ago??).

A virtual stranger at a fireworks party said - it's nice you two still get on.

The mother of my dd's half sister sent me a text today which ended with I hope you are both well. (both as opposed to all).

In themselves they are nothing comments but together they seem a bit or a coincidance

sorry text ended - I hope you are both ok

Bloke in pub - could be from ages ago.

Fireworks thing - Could they have meant it as in 'Ah, together all this time and still in love'?

Other mother - Could both of you mean you and DP? Can you get into a conversation with her again and see if it crops up again?

Doesnt sound too dodgy when you explain it like this.

Have you spoken to dp about it?

half sis mum - def meant both as in dd and me

fireworks party - don't think so we have only been back together almost a year.

bloke in the pub - quite possibly. not sure about this one at all. Very confused about this but wouldn't be able to explain the conversation on here as would take far too long. In short he seemed to know that we'd been together since I had dd but since I had dd we got back together and stayed together. He also knew we together before dd because he asked if dd was dp's. I bet that makes no sense at all.

Could probably nothing and I'm not overly concerned, just wondering if I should be iykwim!

yes a couple of times - he just laughs.

Other than maybe chatting to DD HSs Mum, assuming you get on, I would leave it and see if anything else is said. Then Id give DP a bit more of a grilling.

If you've only been back together fora year then it sounds to me that people just aren't up-to-date with your current situation

lol compo - I live in a village. Believe me everybody is up to date and normal more up to date than the person/peopel it effects iykwim

As you can see I'm not overly concerned but if one more person implies it they might end up under spot light in a darkened room!

Or they could even keep forgetting what your situation is, even if you know that you have told them.

I keep doing this - forgetting which of my relatives have partners and even which are still alive. Maybe I've got alzheimer's. But I think lots of people find it hard to keep abreast of stuff/remember what's going on for other people when they're very busy.

Are you worried that these people have seen your dp out with someone else, or something?

yes miniminx I am. Although I didn't really want to admit it, I guess that there's no point in denying it as you asked outright. It doesn't help that loads of people knew that he and I were getting back together before his girlfriend at the time did. Also I love Christmas but also have some horrible memories - they are particularly prominant this year and I think are making me feel a little insecure.

Oh and I should also add - that we were getting into a taxi a few weeks ago after going out (both drunk) and a girl we both know - who I thought we were both friends with. Called out his name. When I looked up she looked a bit shocked and didn't shout hello or anything, I didn't shout hello either though as it took me until we got in the cab to realise who it was (she looked different, didn't have her glasses on and had her hair up when it'sn ormally down). When I said it was odd to dp in the cab on the way home he didn't really respond but it was bugging me for a good couple of weeks.

However, that really could have been nothing as I'm sure she was drunk also! there was just something about the tone of her voice and the surprise on her face. in fact thinking about it now it's made my stomach knot.

Sorry, didn't mean to be brash, just thought that was what you were implying, but wasn't sure if I'd misunderstood.

Given what you've just said about the history here, it's hardly surprising that you're sensitive about it. If (not sure if this is the case or not) he has been unfaithful in the past, then I'd say the onus is on him to reassure you about this, not to just laugh.

Obviously that's just what I'd expect within my relationship. I'd explain to him that I was a bit thrown by these incidents and say that it made me worry that x was happening and just ask him directly if I had any reason to worry.

He hasn't been unfaithful - ever, at least not that I've found out about.

As far as I am aware (so basically what he tells me) I am the only girl he has ever been faithful too. Make of that what you will.

Mascara I wouldn't worry, really, doesn't sound like much to me

oh hell, sorry x-posted, understand now, what a crp time of year this can be can't it!
and yes, kwym about villages! however I would try to shrug off what other people might or might not think, as the more wound up you get about this the less likely you are to enjoy life with dp (and it sounded to me you were enjoying it v much recently)
Don't look for the next thing to go wrong and spoil things! (well, I do this)
To show you how weird pple's perceptions can be the landlady in our local said recently she took her hat off to me for having successful relationship with p when he;s such a moody bugger .. yes well, just as well she's not on here lol

and girl in the cab, she didn't have her glasses on!! no bloomin wonder she was slow on uptake!

Well in that case, I really wouldn't worry at all.

I think I misinterpreted what you were saying. It does rather sound as if you're building something out of very little here and I would be inclined to just ask dd's half sisters' mum about it on the quiet, if you get on well with her, just to put your mind at rest.

I wouldn't bother to raise it with your partner as it could make you look a bit paranoid.

ahh good, I'm glad you all think I'm reading too much into things! I'm relieved.

Re. the glasses though - she saw dp!! he was getting into the cab and I was on the pavement.

Also - I think if I'm looking for something I'm bound to be able to read into everything aren't I. If I thought he was having an affair with my mum (he isn't obviously) every innocent thing they said to each other I would interpret in a different way.

yes I do this, this is why I'm saying 'please don't' - at least on this evidence! he looks in the clear to me, don't take against him!

Yeah I used to build cases for the prosecution against my dh in my head.

I'm learning not to do it now and I'm getting gradually better at not assuming the worst about stuff.