I tried to log onto facebook the other day to discover my husband had not logged off and a whole conversation he had had with another woman came up. TO begin with I thought it was a joke and as I read more I realised it was real. I know her- she is a student and 20 years younger than us. The sort of girl you always thought you would like to have as a babysitter. That kind of thing! So I read the conversation, which contained sexual suggestiveness from both of them, and was the kind of conversation I remember having when I first met dh 5 years ago. It also talked about coming up to their anniversary- a WHOLE YEAR of this without me knowing! And I gave birth to our second child a year ago, which makes me even more angry!
Confronted him with it when he got home, and he maintains that nothing has ever happened- they haven't even kissed. I don't know if I believe him and I have given him every opportunity to tell the truth. He says they have had these online conversations about 20 times but that he has never seen her on his own. We have seen her together out and about and had chats etc and the thought that the two of them are laughing at me behind my back makes me feel sick.
I don't know whether I believe him and I don't know how to trust him again. We have a 3 year old and a nearly 1 year old and I can't bear the thought of us splitting up. I am pretty tough so I think I can weather it but whether or not it is the right thing to do who knows... THe hardest thing is that I can't talk about it to anyone because if I do, our friends and family will be so angry wiht him that it will spoil our relationships in other ways. Which is why I am posting here, hoping that some sensible and kind other mums can give me some support! I am feeling pretty lonely and pretty angry right now. And confused! Please help if you can!