Is this normal?

[Porkiepie]

my ex and I separated in October, when I discovered him having an affair. I have tried, and succeeded, I think to remain calm and pleasant with him, but now I'm getting seriously cheesed off. At the time in October, he denied any affair - "nothing had happened". nevertheless the nature of texts between the two of them that I discovered were anything but platonic! He and ow split up in January, and since then he's had a brief fling with someone who chucked him out. He's now 1 week into a relationship with a new woman, and to be honest I just don't care. What I do care about is the lies he is telling her about me, and some of the things that he is saying - that his parents hate me (for being mouthy and wasteful) and that I shout and talk to the DC's like a fishwife - not true. I'm really struggling with this, because my own family are not local, and I thought that his parents were ok with me since separating. He is apparently already planning to marry this new ow, and she is in agreement. Completely bizarre in my opinion, but who am I? Is this normal sort of behavior for a bloke when they meet a new woman? What should I do if anything? Our marriage was bad the last year or so, but I tried and what I do know is that he is certainly not father of the year. Should I just laugh this off? I just feel really bad for this woman who has no idea whatsoever what he is really like.
Thanks for any advice or suggestions

He is behaving appallingly, you need to just not engage him at all I think. Perhaps get someone else to act as a go-between re kids' visits etc if possible. If not, just always be in a massive rush or talk over him when he starts divulging unwanted details of his love-life or whatever -0 he should soon get the message. Just don't allow any conversation beyond when he's picking up/dropping the kids.
The stuff he's saying about his parents is most likely BS.

How do you know what he's telling the OW OP?

But whatever he is telling her rise above it. It doesn't matter to you really what she believes about you does it? I should rather feel sorry for her because she is about to go through a horrible experience as his latest 'victim' by the sound of it unless she is switched on and sees him for what he is before she gets too much more involved. Just focus on your own life and making yourself happy.

Are his family okay with you? I wouldn't pay much attention to what you think he is saying about how his family feel towards you - go on your own experience of how they behave towards you.

Your ex is just a pile of BS. He has to justify to new woman why you two split up. He has turned into a total loser but does not want to admit it so has to put the blame on you. New woman is still has her rose coloured glasses on so love and marriage seems so cosy and if she is jumping at marriage so fast,there must be something seriously wrong with her! His parents are probably fine - have you spoken to them? You might find a different story if you do! Still be civil (if you can manange it!!!!) for the DC's if nothing else, because unless new woman is a total brain dead eediot you may find once she gets to know him better she will take off like Usain Bolt and not look back . Did he want to leave or did you make him? He sounds as if he has turned into a lowdown shitty bastard cos his life is not quite going as he planned it! If you ask me you are better off without him, and this woman is NOT your friend nor will she ever be so why do you care what she is told, more fool her if she believes it.

Pick - let's just say I know his passwords for certain websites!
You're all right - sometimes I just need someone to say "he is a twunt!". I just feel like I've been civil, let him see the dc and have them for weekends, in orde that he maintins a relationship with them. His parents have been fine with me, no real difference to normal, so I guess it,s him lying to himself again - a great talent of his!

Mumoy - I made him leave, because he and let me down in soooo many ways, over a lot of years - emotional abuse, nil to minimal involvement with his dc, no responsibility for money, house anything etc. And blaming me for everything that was wrong in his life - including his screwing up his job, his affair etc - complete ar@e I'm sure you'll agree!

Is it normal? Of course it is, for that kind of person, and it has absolutely nothing to do with you. None at all.

He is puffing himself up for the new conquest and will degrade any and all of his past connections as substandard in declaring the new one superior by comparison. He is flattering her at your expense. Not about you.

Stop checking his websites; nothing good will come of it.

Porkiepie you have answered it all for yourself in your responses, I should raise a glass of champers to you , but it's late and I'm too lazy to go downstairs to get the bottle!!!!!!! You are free of the little shit! TeachMySelfBalance is right, stop checking the websites, again I say you are FREE! Just get on with making your life happy, move on don't look back, you have already made the right move. He's gonna crash and burn AGAIN!!!!

Normal for selfish fuckers, yes.
Normal for loving partners? No.
Normal for human beings you'd like to have in your DC's lives? No.

Well done for getting rid and I hope his parents continue to ignore his in(s)ane rantings over the evidence of their own eyes and DGC.

Poor new woman - she'll learn at some point, but probably not quickly enough. However, presumably she'll have a while - you're not divorced already, are you?

Too right thumb witch about the in(s)an ranting! Apparently, he and the new ow are going to get married - after a whole week of messaging and one face to face meeting! Completely barking! No, need to get a divorce still, but just getting house sold first, which is a whole other story.
Are there actually any nice men left out there? Although I'm ok at the mo, I really don't want to be on my own forever, but as a forty something - think it may not happen:(

Just Walk Away.

Don't waste any more time with this crap. Let them all get on with it.