death of estranged sibling how do I ask sister if she knows?

[shouldbeelswhere]

Just had a phone call from my cousin arranging to meet up, thing is how do I find out if she knows that her estranged brother has died very suddenly?

Ask her outright, there's no other way.

When you see her, give her a copy of the obit and say you weren't sure if she knew yet or not, but thought she might want to know.

Tough one.

I think just putting on a solemn expression and saying "I'm sorry I'm not sure if you'll have heard about this yet or not but I heard last week that ...." is about the only thing you can do. If she's already heard she may well interrupt you and then you can say "I thought you'd probably already heard but I didn't want to not mention it" and then express whatever you think appropriate given the tricky relationship. Better that than either not mentioning the subject, or blurting it out because you assume she knows.

Thank you. Yes, it just feels so awkward...I might get my sister to do it...or is that too much of a cop out! No seriously thank you I'll say "I'm not sure if you'll have heard..." I just worry about being the one to tell her if she doesn't already know. It's not like we're close family, we don't have contact more than about once a year and she was only ringing me to arrange to take my dad out!

Just wanted to say thank you to everyone, but seems I worried unnecessarily. Apparently she does know...her reaction...well that's a whole new story...no doubt I'll hear all about it when I see her. I know families are difficult sometimes but it seems so sad to me.