Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Sick of Dp constantly whinging about my cooking

27 replies

ShellyQueen · 29/05/2011 16:14

Everynight you can guarantee he'll whinge and moan about whatever I'm cooking even if it's his favourite, chicken, red meat, veggy, pasta, fish you name it he'll moan but he does tend to eat everything so it can't be that bad but the moaning wears me down today I've not been feeling well so I just made peanut butter sarnies for lunch and he kicked off because he didn't want that and squashed it onto the wall and said it was kid's food but I never know if it's genuinly crap or not because he moans about EVERYTHING I cook or make. I know peanut butter isn't great but as a one off thing? I'm sure he could have made something had he got off his arse but if he has to make it he'll only make his own not mine or DCs

OP posts:

PogueMahone · 29/05/2011 16:17

He squashed it onto the wall. Are you kidding? Is he 3? If my 3yo did that I'd be shocked. Between that and belittling your efforts he sounds like a thoroughly unpleasant man. I would guess that he's pretty horrible in other ways too.

K999 · 29/05/2011 16:19

Tell him to get off his fat lazy arse and make his own dinner. What a knob. Is he like this all the time? I would not make another meal for him from now on.

blabalalalablabla · 29/05/2011 16:19

he squashed his dinner into the wall?
does this man have any redeeming features?

FattyAcid · 29/05/2011 16:19

Ask him why he moans about it all the time

K999 · 29/05/2011 16:20

If he was even half decent he would have made lunch since you are not feeling well. What a twat.

Mabelface · 29/05/2011 16:20

I'd stop cooking for him completely. Sounds like you could do with discarding that useless bit of skin at the end of his willy - him.

keynesian · 29/05/2011 16:21

I suspect you can guess what the consensus of opinion on here may well be...

But if he were mine I wouldn't be cooking for him; just buy the ingredients, prepare and cook the food for you and DC.

(I had peanut butter and jam on a pitta bread for lunch, DH had a philadelphia and tomato sandwich.) :)

sue52 · 29/05/2011 16:22

Sounds like a selfish, emotionally abusive knob to me too. Does he behave like this in front of the DC?

FattyAcid · 29/05/2011 16:23

Are you a sahm?

buzzsore · 29/05/2011 16:23

What's genuinely crap is him behaving like this. If absolutely every other part of your relationship is wonderful, then I would stop cooking for this critical idiot and shove a saucepan in his hand.

If the relationship has other problems, and I bet there are, I'd be thinking seriously about where to go from here.

CarryOnUpTheAIBU · 29/05/2011 16:24

Knob.

blackeyedsusan · 29/05/2011 16:24

squashed it into the wall? is there more going on than that. what is his attitude to housework generally? Who does what? what about childcare?

Ruprekt · 29/05/2011 16:24

Then stop cooking for him.

When DH moaned about my ironing skills I stopped ironing for him. He ironed a few times, realised it was a pain in the arse to iron, apologised with a bunch of flowers and I started ironing again.

Buy the food, cook for you and the children and tell him the food is in the kitchen if he wants it or he can cook for himself.

Or cook for the whole family after meal planning and shopping for it.

DO NOT TAKE ANY MORE WHINGING FROM HIM............

............and I am speechless about squishing the sandwich into the wall.

Katisha · 29/05/2011 16:25

He is a pillock of the first order.

TheFlyingOnion · 29/05/2011 16:26

are you fucking kidding?

why are you doing all his cooking?

you are being a doormat.

JenniL1977 · 29/05/2011 16:27

Tell him to fuck off to fuckoff land and fuck off a bit more once he gets there. Who does he think he is?!
Does he criticise you in other ways?
You have my sympathy OP, but you shouldn't be putting up with that.

Jemma1111 · 29/05/2011 16:29

He puts you down every day, sounds like your'e in an abusive relationship, especially if as others have said are there other problems with him?

Be wary of this idiot

FattyAcid · 29/05/2011 16:32

Your dp should be grateful for you making his meals and not critical - this is not how relationships are supposed to be.

FattyAcid · 29/05/2011 16:32

He shows you no respect

Cadmum · 29/05/2011 16:33

I actually laughed out loud at the squashing the sarnie part, but seriously?!?

My recommendation is that you give him the responsibility of preparing the family meals. If it is important enough for him to complain about then why doesn't he deal with it?

Dh and I went through a spell (when I was expecting dc4 and sick all day long) where he moaned about virtually everything I made. The final straw was when he prepared a meal that none of our dcs ate and then proceeded to boast about how great it was to have a 'proper meal'. I have not taken cooking seriously or made an honest attempt to please his gourmet tastes ever since...

Dh and ds1 prepare and cook most of the meals to this day and db#4 is 5...

My dh didn't smear food on the wall though!

redflagsahoy · 29/05/2011 20:25

what the??he squashed it against the wall! what a complete lack of respect he has for you and for food. What a plonker if I've ever heard it....what a complete idiot. Sorry OP your cooking has been bypassed by me and I went straight to the fact that this 'adult' squashed good food against a wall....sounds like a real stand up guy. not. Don't cook him another morsel, tosspot.

tooposh · 29/05/2011 20:35

OP are you okay? It's tough hearing that kind of thing, but the posters are right, I am afraid. Your DH's behaviour is utterly unacceptable. I expect he thinks he is being "helpful" every time he tells you your cooking is rubbish but the reality is that he is grinding you down. My DH used to be the same and if, like you, I was too ill to cook, he would go out on his own to eat or just cook for himself. I now have a lovely DP who is NORMAL, and wonder how I ever put up with that, but it is very difficult to escape, especially when your own self esteem has sunk so low after putting up with that for years. Your first step is to recognise that this is not how other men behave, that it is not your fault (but HIS problem) and then take some time to consider where to go from here. I expect it is unrealistic to just stop cooking for him (I have been there)

How old are the DC?

Zimm · 30/05/2011 10:47

OP - I am worried there is a whole bunch of other nastiness you are not telling us :-( Is this man abusive in other ways? Squashing a sandwhich is not normal behaviour.

If he is lovely in other ways then just stop cooking for him. Now. Today.

RudeEnglishLady · 30/05/2011 10:56

Squashing a sandwich sounds quite aggressive and a bad example to the DCs. I would say only cook for yourself and the DCs but I'm worried he'll start to attack you on other fronts. Do you think he was just having a bad day? Is he otherwise normal?

MoaningLisa · 30/05/2011 11:00

I hope you didn't clean it after him?

Flip

1 2