I don't think I ever want a relationship again

[whatever17]

I split up with ex-DH 10 years ago. Have had a couple of relationships since. The last one ended about 5 years ago, I was really distraught at the ending.

Since then I have just bimbled on looking after the DCs, house, garden, seeing mates etc.

I actually feel much more content and stable not being in a relationship. I haven't had sex in 5 years and I don't miss it.

I feel like a fake saying to my friends - No, I am happier without a boyfriend. But I sometimes say to myself - what do you want, a boyfriend or a gardener. And a gardener/handyman or a lottery win wins every time.

I think I just want extra financial input and physical help and I can't be bothered with the rest of it.

One of my friends is in a constant maelstrom of boyfriends letting her down or her feeling let down and it just puts me off.

There are I mean...

I would just like a nice bloke for massage/sex/diy and gardening and a companion but NOT to live with!

Soon kills it all that overfamiliarity if you ask me.

It is a lot easier on one's own the longer I am on my own the more accustomed to it I am - which is now six years - and my son is also getting a lot easier so that really helps too.

Most men are a bit controlling I find and I am too independent now I couldn't cope with all of that.

I have been married three times in the past and am happy alone!

I know what you mean. I think I appreciate my freedom more than the average single woman though, because I was in an abusive relationship for 8 years. I also have children and I just don't know how I could make a relationship work. I literally can't visualise it. There are things I want so much more than a man. A good job I love and my own home that I own. When I get those two in place first, if it happens it happens.

Yes that is ideally what I'd like to find Snowmama. A really great friend who I really liked and really fancied and with whom I had a respectful and loving relationship, but who was happy just to see eachother once a week or so and for the odd weekend here and there. Someone who didn't expect to move in or monopolize my time.

However I find that most single men my age (I'm 35) tend to be looking for a woman to settle down and breed with. And there's no way I'd consider that - I don't want any more children and I don't want to share my home with a partner.

It is great to hear from so many other women are contentedly partner-free though - I find it really inspiring.

MakeYerOwn - is that "man in a box" syndrome? I would be scared of having a whole human being around. But someone to have sex with and help with the garden and to put up shelves would be lovely.

Then I could pop them back in a box again!

Oh can I add as well, I wish there was a like button on here, especially for SGB's posts!

I finally split from ex dp only last week and after 2 days of feeling a bit shit, all I can now feel is relief and liberation. Is it normal for me to have recovered so quickly! Certainly it was over in my head long before it was actually over iykwim.

I have always been more contented on my own, hopefully i'll have learnt my lesson this time and stay single! I certainly never want to commit myself to another person like that again.

A bit of no strings sex sounds fun, but don't they always try and get more from you, so it ends up more hassle than its worth!

I have brothers and a very handy mum for diy, I can pay someone now my money is not going on ridiculous household expenses, me and my son can do what we want when we want.

Do I want to make up miserable and pissed off every day again, nope!

Sorry a bit of an elated ramble there!!

Well if any of you single ladies need a good servicing now again just let me know. I can ensure you end up with a good ride and have had no complaints thus far :-)

oh..I forgot to mention, I'm a mechanic.

That's so sweet of you.