I miss being in a relationship....

[Mummalish]

Feeling rather alone at the moment. I am forgetting what it's like to be in a happy relationship where someone loves you, and cares for you.

Feels like I crave someones arms around me (and maybe more!), or just some attention. Loneliness sucks.

Feel very sad at times, I know relationships aren't the be all and end all of life, but it's certainly nice to feel loved by someone special.

Anyone else feel the same?

Hi - yes, I'm feeling the same after years of an emotionally distant/abusive relationship and now being a single mum. I feel that apart from my mum and children, there's no-one out there that loves me and I do miss having someone special. Or just someone to talk to at the end of the day, relax with and have a bit of a snuggle. It can be really lonely.

I think I've forgotten what a good relationship is like, too. I'm in no rush to start off a new one, in fact I have no idea how on earth to go about it, but I would like to magically be say a year into a good relationship with a decent, honest, caring man and feel safe and secure with him. Whether or not I'll ever get to the stage where I can get over the past and make attempts to start again I don't know, but I just wanted to say you are not alone and I am sure there are many more of us out there.

I know what you mean but at the same time there are a lot of positives to being single too. I reckon most single parents feel the same, it can feel quite lonely when the dcs are in bed on an evening can't it, or when everyone is having family days out! I remind myself I know a lot of unhappy couples who appear happy to the outside world, it would be nice to be in a good relationship, but I'm not prepared to settle for less than that anymore.

I have worked hard on building up my female friendships, I get my hugs and company from them! This has taken a long time but has been well worth it, they are a mixture of single and coupled up and I don't know what I'd do without them.

Mummalish, I really sympathise and know what you mean by your examples- there's just a deep longing for a bit of respite and affection that pops up at times when you're single. It does make you feel sad because it's such a strong feeling, especially in the evenings.

I'm not sure what your situation is but I've found that there are plenty of things that I've found outside of a relationship that I thought I could only get from one- I'm talking about things like support, comfort, great times. Just confiding in one person and having a laugh made me feel loads better. Do you have people you can talk to? It can really help when you're feeling alone because sometimes you do need to talk those feelings out.

In the meantime: develop hobbies and passions, take risks and talk to new people, make little and big plans. Having one project to occupy you can do wonders and make you feel good about yourself when you achieve something. Write a list of the things you want to do and try this year- food, museums, places. These sad feelings may still pop up and be there, but in the meantime it is better to focus your energy on doing new and interesting things for yourself than on someone who's yet to come into your life. And when someone does come into your life you'll be ready.

I do have people I can talk to, but often find at the weekends, these people are too busy with their own families to be bothered with me. I understand that, I suppose.

I do need to just keep busy and enjoy my own company more. Who knows what will happen in the future, the world is full of happy people.

Sometimes I don't think humans were made to be alone.