"Good relationships don't hurt"

[meditrina]

So said Michelle Obama yesterday to a group of inner city schoolgirls tank to visit Oxford.

She wasn't talking just about DH/DP/BF/GF, but all the relationships in life. "Do not bring someone into your life who weighs you down".

Is this the right message?

girlscout I disagree completely. Yes of course some women are in unhappy relationships, but you are hideously over-generalising. Taking posts on MN into account doesn't really give an accurate overview of relationships because most people only post in 'relationships' if they have a problem, not to tell the world how happy they are!

IME the 'tight 1+1' set up is a wonderfully fulfilling way to bring up a family and live a happy life at the same time - not just from my own experience but from family & friends around me. I'm genuinely sorry you've obviously not had that experience.

Thanks meditrina. I'm going to get my 13 yr old daughter to watch. And try to internalize a bit of her awesomeness myself. I have a massive crush on the two of them.

Mm- we both come from tight 1+1 relationships and they both work for one reason or another. maybe we can agree that all long term dependant relationships change us and our aspirations through time.

Yes that's fair enough. And I understand how you say it is insidious when your life doesn't turn out that way. But as the mother of a young DD, I can only try to lead her by my example of a happy, healthy relationship and hope she grows up with enough self esteem to expect as much (at least) for herself - as you obviously do for yours too