i freezed whenever DP come on to me in a loving way :-(

[sayingnotosex]

as ive been like that since i had first baba (as i had emergency c-section) 13 months ago

It had healed up brilliantly, and its slightly tender as its takes a while to heal up fully and got a slight red colour scar so ive had no problems with it. i can touch it with no problem but whenever my loving DP comes anywhere near me, im finding excuses for him not to come near me and in the early days he used to come over and put his hand on my stomach, in a caressing way it used to hurt as he kept on forgetting i had the c-section, but now if he feels my stomach, im like "be careful" even though its alot better but DP is heavy handed

pls help!!

anyone??

I have had 2 vaginal births and after each I didnt have sex for at least 9months,i couldnt believe my GP saying it was OK after 6 weeks.My youngest is now 13months and our sex life isnt great,I feel very fragile,so with your circumstances i am not surprised you are feeling how you are!!
Sorry i cant give you great advice as havent had a c section

I am 5 weeks after "normal" vaginal delivery - (if you can call 2 hours of pushing normal !!!) - still have sore bits and could not consider sex for ages !! It took 9 months after 1st delivery (also vaginal!) Am totally shocked by people who can have sex after only a short time I think if you do not feel like it - it is bes not too.

I had 3 sections.

I can really relate to that feeling that your body is very fragile - I felt as if my insides were about to come out for ages afterwards.

The scar is much stronger than you think, but you will need to feel you can trust your partner to be gentle at first as you readjust to using your body in a sexual way again.

Could you talk to your partner - not when he's making an advance, but away from that situation, so that you can do it without flinching, which might offend him - when you're both defensive, it can be easy for arguments to start. Just explain that you still feel fragile and need to take things very slowly, because it feels scary being touched. Tell him it's not personal, but that you may need to tell him to stop, if something twinges, or if you feel scared and you need to know that he will stop straightaway and not be offended, if you are to be able to relax during sex.

Hopefully, you can then rebuild confidence together.

well i had a talk with him last nite as he is "sexually frustrated" atm and i told him exactly why im feeling like this so he was more gentle to me today and he said that he undertstands.

im "sayingnotosex" as i realised that ive got nothing to hide and a few people are in the same situation as i am!