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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

So lonely and so miserable, crap weekend

10 replies

Kimberjem · 15/05/2011 20:38

Hi,
Am just posting because I am feeling so low, just back from the funeral of a wonderful man, my dad's best friend since they were 3 and family to me and come back to an empty lonely house. I am pretty sure my ex who I broke up with a few weeks ago is out on a date, he has thrown himself into Internet dating, and it's just so bloody painful and I can't get hold of any of my RL friends to talk, hence posting here. I would so have loved a partner who could be there with me today and who would have been out for dinner with me and my parents last night, I feel like finding that person for me is never going to happen. incidentally, I have a date this week, from the three full days or so I managed on match before my ex joined and then I left because I couldn't cope with seeing him on there. I am not really looking forward to it but know I need to keep myself busy. Just so miserable, someone please tell me this is going to get better, thanks x

OP posts:
MigratingCoconuts · 15/05/2011 20:59

Sad sorry you are so low... I am sure it will get better, you have had a lot of bad things happen all at once.

Take care xx

Terraviva · 15/05/2011 21:01

Hi Kimberjem,

So sorry to hear you've had such an awful time lately. Coming back to an empty house after a funeral of a dear friend is going to hit anyone really hard.

It is going to get better. This is one of those periods in life where you have to take it a day at a time, an hour at a time if you need to, but it will get better.

I'm sure someone will come along here soon with wiser words than I can offer, but I just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

FabbyChic · 15/05/2011 21:04

It's hard when things are at a low point in our lives not to have someone to talk to, to come home to. This is a new experience for you but in time things will get better as time passes you will be able to deal with things alone rather than neededing the suppor of others. It's a totally new world, and one that will get better. Promise.

Good luck on your date I hope it goes well.

Original poster
Kimberjem · 15/05/2011 22:16

Thanks all, need to remember all the good things I have, great friends, family, a job I like, lovely home etc. I have spoken to my ex and he was indeed on a date, he is moving on and it hurts, feels like I meant nothing. Anyhow, I need to pull my socks up and cheer up and thanks for the kind words. X

OP posts:
Doha · 15/05/2011 22:45

Just remember there are other dating websites... March is but one of many Smile

SoloIsAHotCougar · 15/05/2011 22:51

Hi Kimberjem.
I can totally relate to how you feel. After my Dad passed away, all I needed/wanted was a strong pair of arms wrapped around me, some care and consideration but it wasn't there...
Things seem to be looking up a little now, but it's taken a long time ~ partly because I've not really wanted another man messing with my head and heart. It will get better, but maybe not immediately. I really hope you feel better soon.

Original poster
Kimberjem · 15/05/2011 22:59

Thanks, going to bed now and hope for a better week next week. Night all. X

OP posts:
SoloIsAHotCougar · 15/05/2011 23:08

Night.x

aurynne · 16/05/2011 05:03

"I am pretty sure my ex who I broke up with a few weeks ago is out on a date, he has thrown himself into Internet dating" --> You are so romanticizing online dating!... I will tell you instead what is happening right now with your ex: he is probably hitting on 40 women at the same time, being rejected by 39 of them, finally getting interest from a hypochondriac crazy woman who will date him, he won't fancy her, but she will make him pay for dinner and then stalk him ruthlessly for the next 4 months. He will come home to a lonely place, and beat himself up about leaving you, but his male ego won't let him show. He will instead regal his friends (and perhaps even you) with stories about passionate nights of lust with hot babes that just offered to shag him online. In reality, he will have a wank in front of some porn in the internet before getting drunk and fall asleep in a stupor.

Yes, life will get better for you, and you will find a person who will be by your side when you need him. And who knows, it may be that date this week :)

Original poster
Kimberjem · 16/05/2011 20:15

Thanks Aurynne, that made me laugh, I of course am imagining beautiful, nymphomaniac, hilarious rocket-scientists aplenty, but there aren't many of them around, it's just one of those break up things torturing yourself about what your ex is up to. I am feeling loads churlish today, almost back to my usual self, thanks ladies. X

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