Found out my husband sexting someone last night, and now fear miscarriage :(

[theringleader]

My husband and I are going through a tough time in our relationship and have r a while but never in a million years I thought he would cheat. The text indicated he was planning to meet this woman and f/;[ck . I happened to be on the phone with my father in law who was wishing me a happy mothers day when th text came in. I flipped and told my FIL and my husband admitted to it. I found the number on my phone bill and they have been sending text/pics for some time, each night when Im at work. To make matters worse my husband and I want to have another child- I will be turning 39 this year so Im running out of time to continue having children, and we have a 2 year old now. I may be pregnant now. Meanwhle my FIL is telling me my husband never wanted a second child and is just doing it because I want to and thats the only reason Im in this marriage and I just need to top nagging etc! My husband denies saying this to his father (whom I thought I had good relationship with). Im deeply hurt and feel betrayed. My husband still wants another baby he says but I no longer think its a good idea, and this morning am having some heavy bleeding so I dont know if Im having a miscarriage or not. I am seeing a Doctor tomorrow. My husband and I both are not having our needs met and he wants councellling now and some help with his drinking prob. I cant afford to leave at this point, and cant afford to raise a son alone otherwise I would have thrown in the towel. I guess my question is- Is it possible to forgive and to forget something like this and have a happy relationship? I want my son to grow up in a two parent home in a nice neigborhood- good school etc thing s I cant provide by myself

Hugs and sorry to hear your probs. You must be hurting so much.

I am leaving my OH over a different issue but he has been sex texting and it hurts more than I can say.

Sorry I can't give more helpful advice.

How awful for you. how are you today?

I think you can forgive in time, but forget, well, I know I couldn't but we are all different.

I can understand you wanting to work things out, but don't think that this is now your lot. He will have to help support your child. Yes, the child may not have two parents together but your happiness is just as important here. Don't put up with this for the sake of the child.

Im sorry you fear a miscarriage, and Im sorry your husband is such an arse.

However, you need to address why he has done this, and why he was arranging to have sex with someone else.

He has cheated on you and I feel you do not realise the magnitude of this.

Children have two parents for life, however they do not have to live together in order to be loved and secure.

YOu say you worry about finances but your partner would have to support you.

I do feel that another child at the moment would be the wrong route to take, it is a myth it brings couples closer together, my brother tried it and it did not work.

Work on finding out why, and what he feels is lacking in the relationship, maybe he doesn't want another child. If not you might have to reconsider concieving.

Glossing over what he has done will not work as it will live with you forever.

This post is blatantly lifted from boards.ie

www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056265579

Great post Fabbychic.

Let us know how you are, theringleader. X

Oh my god, heavy bleeding, I hope you are OK, I haemorrhaged on my 2nd MC and nearly died, please get yourself to the hospital.

Your H can wait. The FIL too. That acorn certainly didn't fall too far from that unfeeling tree did it?

bollocks to the pair of them.

So, the OP may be the same person. No law against posting on two forums is there?

Trolls hunting is out of season surely ?

Maybe OP posted in different places to get a better reponse - no law against it.

OP, sorry to hear of your situation, counselling seems like a good option to help you move forward, in whatever direction you decide to go.

it isn't a direct copy and paste, so it could be the same poster.

Hopefully...

How awful for you.
Think FIL needs to butt out.
don't think you should be with someone because you want a nice house, schooling for your child
You are worth more than that surely.
Only you know if you can forgive

What country are you in OP?

Isn't it allowed to seek advice from more than one source then?
Look, I tend to reply even when people are going on about trolling because even if the original poster isn't genuine (and I'm not saying that here), the situations posted about may resonate with someone in a similar situation, and the replies may help them in some way.
Op, I think I'd be inclined to try to get some time to assimilate all this and think about what you want out of the rest of your life. Maybe your idiot, alcoholic DH could go stay with his supportive father for a few days? You can't decide to stay with a man you don't love just because you want a certain sort of home for your child. You need to work out what you need out of life and then go from there.

For those worried about trolling. I poared on another sitr to get advice and someobe recommended this one. My post is long so i repasred so i didnt have to retype the whole thing. Im awaiting results to see if in fact I am or was pregnant. I am no longer wishibg to try for another child. I hope i am not pregnant. My husband has ejected his father out of his life and we are going to get help. I take responsibilty for some of the unhappiness in our relationship. i hope i can forgive

Thats awful OP. The Father of your husband sounds like an interfering shit stirrer. You did the right thing getting him out of your face for the moment.
Your husband has behaved disgracefully. Don't you be in any rush to forgive him OR take on too much responsibility either. Let the fucker grovel as he should. At least that. I'm not sure what to advise you, keep on posting here though. Lots of good advice. I hope you will be ok.

Thank you everyone for your support and helpful advice. Luckily it turns out Im not pregnant . Im getting along better with my husband but am still very hurt and that my dream to have a second child is squashed. My husband says he still wants another baby but after what my FIL said, I believe my husband was badmouthing me to his family even though he wont man up to it. We are scheduled with a marriage counsellor next week. Im sad that my life plans have been squashed.