Anybody else saved their marriage and turned it around on 'The Marriage Course?'

[jugofwildflowers]

As a last ditch effort before calling the lawyers we googled then went on 'the marriage course'. We are not religious but it was the best thing we ever did. After the 7 week course which started with a lovely meal we are like newlyweds. Anyone else out there had a similar experience?

Dont know anything about it but if it can cause such a turnaround its got to be worth it!!

Is it a religious course then?

Yes it is but most of it is just plain old common sense and a good way of reminding yourself to listen to and respect the other person.

We're Christians and our church runs the course each year. We went along the year we joined and really enjoyed it - there wasn't anything wrong with our marriage but it was still worthwhile and a good grounding for when we started a family.

I like the sound of it (just googled it) - DH and I are separated at the moment but hoping to find our way back to each other. DH not into religion though (I go to church) so not sure if the religious aspect would put him off - is there much in it?

I can't honestly remember the finer details I'm afraid, just that we both found it interesting and useful and we enjoyed it. Perhaps you could contact the church running the course, explain the situation and ask them?

My dh and I are not particularly religious but we married in a church like most people. So I'd say it really is a course everyone would benefit from, whatever they have a faith or not.

The course is absolutely brilliant because they focus on one topic at a time with time to practice new techniques.

We had to laugh when we realised just how many bad habits we'd managed to picked up in 14 years such as being highly critical, not really listening and how our sex life was non existent due to simmering resentment that had built up for years.

But it had been no laughing matter being in that horrible state for years, we were both pretty depressed and miserable and each blaming the other of course.

Now we make special time for each other, make love and make each other feel valued. We'd tried Relate years ago but that wasn't any good as it raised issues but didn't solve anything.

I wish I'd known about the marriage course years ago!

I will find out more about this I think.

jugofwildflowers - thanks for sharing your experience. We too have done relate and whilst it was good to get everything out in the open, I think we would benefit now from some skills and tips to resolve things.

Now just to find a way of convincing DH that it would be good!

YES YES YES YES. It is fantastic! regardless of faith.

Just ordered the book!

We did the Marriage Preparation Course (similar kind of thing by the same people, but for couples about to get married) and we found it invaluable.

After every meeting, DH and I would have the most enormous flaming argument, and then realise that it all needed to be said and out in the open, and after that we were stronger. Really puts some key issues into perspective and helps you to find compromise, respect and acknowledge that you're a team.

DH and I have read the book and have attended the Marriage Course run at a couple's home a few years ago.

It is certainly worth going to whether you are Christian or not. I must admit that there is actually quite little about the bible in there. However, the books are very user friendly, there's some exercises at the end of each chapter for you to discuss with one another.

Depending where you are, they are often quite heavily subscribed. But you can find out about courses on the link below.

Relationship Central

Thanks so much, there are a few places running them in my area so will get on and find out when and where there are spaces.

Lovely to see how positive it's been on the marriages here

wish all the MNers who are having difficulties could know about this course, I really think it would help. I agree, there is very little about religion in it but I think that's a good thing.

We went, as an attempt to fix things when we were under MASSIVE strain. H is an atheist, and yet went along with good grace. We were both astonished at how fantastic it was, how useful and how many people we knew when we got there! I couldn't recommend it more highly, it's very useful, no public self disclosure, and has turned us back into who we were when we got engaged, rather than how we had been, ready to throttle each other! Do it!

BagofHolly - lovely to hear another positive story, and really helpful to know that your DH went and enjoyed it being an atheist.

There is a course running near me that starts in two weeks so I'm going to see if DH will give it a go - fingers crossed! I agree too that the lack of religion in it is a good things, makes it more realistic I think.

I might show him this thread.

Scarlotti, I really hope he does it. My H is a beer and fags bloke's bloke who would rather eat his own foot than "discuss our relationship." I think he thought it was cheaper than calling in the lawyers! Ours was really nicely facilitated, very private and very useful. I don't think he feels any differently about religion, but we both feel differently about "us." Instead of things descending into a screaming, door slamming row we now are much better able to deal with each other and the different way we look at things. Seriously, do it! V best of luck! X

Very sorry to hear you're separated, by the way. Don't give up hope! X x

Thanks, trying to stay positive!

Helps to know your DH is very blokey but still enjoyed it. Will let you know what mine says!