Please help my friend (questions about American dating rules)

[Kalypso]

I would very much appreciate some advice which I can pass on to my friend.

She got chatting to an American guy at an event this morning, and had a really nice conversation with him. At the end he gave her his number (she hadn't asked for it). He was friendly, confident and laid-back in his manner.

I presume he's asking her on a date, but in a way that ensures she instigates the where and when.

Her question is, according to American dating rules, when should she text and when should she add him on Facebook? When should she suggest meeting up? This is, of course, assuming he expects things to unfold according to American dating rules....

She can be a bit shy but definitely thinks he?s quite cute, so is happy to take the initiative, although she normally wouldn?t be like that - I think the fact he's so laid-back makes it easier for her.

Over to you MNetters!

Hmm, I don't think there's any particularly American rule on this, but this is my American take:

imo, I would not take this as an invitation to ask him out, specifically, but rather as an invitation to text him and develop things further, toward that ultimate direction. In other words, he signaled his interest toward her in a way that did not painfully expose him to rejection. So her texting him will confirm signal received, all is clear to proceed, and then it is a bit wide open where they drive it next.

If it was me I would send him a short text perhaps Sunday evening - just a wink & a hey. Then they have all week to text. Alternatively, starting from the same opening of a text on Sunday, they could arrange a casual initial meet, perhaps something will come up in conversation - a place/food/drink they both like.

Come to think of it, my dh and I texted back and forth before we arranged to meet for a date, and it was him who proposed it, so that is probably why I am thus advising, though ymmv.

Lovely to have some springtime flirtation. :)

Thanks so much for the reply, it was very helpful :)

I have passed on your advice, and she was actually going to text today anyway, so all's good. Fingers-crossed, as he sounds lovely!

1 - there are no rules

2 - if he is aware that she is not American then even if he does think there are rules then he should expect some variation

3 - stop overthinking!