This makes so much sense !

[joanne34]

I was reading this website, it's a bit Americanized but I think it really makes sense.... There's alot to read though !

www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5520_qa.html

I can completely understand how men and women prioritise the 10 different emotional needs !

I don't necessarily think that "men do this" and "women do this" is very helpful.

Recognising that other people think about things differently is useful in all kinds of relationships though, not just marriage or male/female relationships.

Wow, you read that quick, im still reading...

Im on this bit now ;
www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8111_leave.html

I didn't need to read it to make that comment - I was referring to your "men and women prioritise the 10 different emotional needs"

Oh right - well that was in my own words, not the info on the site...

I think it's helpful, although not sure what DP will make of it ! Especially The policy of joint agreement !

Don't mean to be harsh, I just initally think that anything that says "men do this" and "women do this" is starting off from a flawed premise.

Spending too long on the Feminism topic maybe? :)

Yes I see what you mean, I did'nt mean to categorise men and women.

Just from reading it, I have been astounded in thinking that ' This is my Relationship ' !

No worries :)

I've read the marriagebuilders site for about 8 years. They have a lot of good stuff on there, particularly about recovery from affairs. I have a number of the books too. The books make it clear that whilst statistically men and women tend to have different emotional needs, some men and some women fall into the 'other' category so that emotional needs are emotional needs, whoever has them.

I have sent the link to DP. I think we both really need to read it all... to me it seems spot on ! ( but i havent read all of it yet )

I liked the idea of The policy of joint agreement and the 15 hours a week of undivided attention, although in theory, I cant see it really happening, but we do both need to make more of an effort !

There is quite a strong religious leaning on the site which might bother some. Even as a militant atheist I can just leave that aside and read the rest of it.