wy do mumsnetters who a re having realtionship problems

[cod]

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Hi cod - how are you? Still taking typing lessons?

Does anyone else find they have to read cod's posts out loud to understand them? Or perhaps it's just me....

Hello, totally new to mumsnet, what probs are we talking about then?

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Cod - I wish I'd been in lxix on Saturday night. Haven't been out for ages and that used to be one of our favourite haunts (and still is dh's). Bump is huge now. Sigh.

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Cool - let me know when.

I think it's because on here you are talking to everyone at once regardless so they want to carry on as though nothing is happening but also talk out the problems..and afterwards they don't want to be thought of as poor thing with problems

and no one is as anonymous as they imagine if they post over a period of time

i know that the Mnetters that i talk to regularly probably know what my real MN name is and im not bothered however, DH also knows my real MN name and sometimes comes on here and i dont want him to know what i am talking about some of the time, also i dont understand the problem anyone has with name changing-its not like if offends anyone and if it does-dont read the post.

I can never understand why anyone would tell all on a website anyway - I never would

I changed my name, mainly because my H knows my regular MN name & I was pertrified of him finding out that I had spoken about our problems on here.
The reason I ended up talking about my relationship on here, is that I needed an outsiders point of view, rather than that of someone who knows H & me personally & would just tell me what I wanted to hear.
I am not looking for sympathy - just advice.

I suppose its they feel a bit vulnerable too.

I have to be honest though, when reading threads where author has changed their name (and particularly if they have said so too), i find me self drifting away from the point and spending more time thinking about who they really are, such is my curious nature.

god yes

I always try to guess

GhoulsTOo

sometimes easier to tell people you dont know that people in RL
people respond truthfully, like Stressedmummy says in RL they may say what they think you want to hear....

I dont change my name though - be glad if DH DID read what I put - might get through to him

That's not fair - I want to meet hmc.

harumph.

I try to guess too, but if there was sthing bad happening and I wanted advice, I think I might change my name too

don't know how to, though! - doesn't seem to work whenever I tried temporary name-changes

yes teevee i dont know how to change a name as well. if some one know on mn let me know, can be handy sometime.

I think it's easier to talk about very personal things if you feel anonymous, and as people get to know you under your mn name, it feels less and less anonymous. Even if people can guess who you are, it's the illusion of anonymity that helps someone open up. IMO

um, i probably sound a bit stupid but surely the beauty of a site like mumsnet is that the people you are talking to are - in the main- anonymous, thus making it more secure to vent in a manner you probably would not consider normally anyway. i dont really see why its a problem if people change their names. whether we know who someone is or not should not really affect whether we have compassion or relate and can advise them on their situation, otherwise noone new would ever join! not trying to be controversial, just dont really see why its an issue.

yes you're right, pretty fly
but could nayone enlighten me on how to go about it??? (namechanging i mean)

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Mumsnet isn't really anonymous, it's just getting to know people by a different name to their usual one. But you can still get to know them quite well and form an opinion of them and they might be afraid that any good opinions would be jeopardised by admitting to something bad or embarassing. So I imagine that is why they change their name again for those types of thread.