Sorry guys - probably being totally unreasonable but needed a rant (and not putting it in AIBU to be told I am being totally unreasonable). BEWARE COULD BE LONG AND BORING....
My partner is great in many ways but is a bit of a little boy lost, which I find very frustrating. This week however he has totally outdone himself and now I am so annoyed.
I have been struggling with a health issue for a wee while - having tests at the mo, doesnt look like anything majorly serious but enough to need lots of scans and blood tests, so feel run down. I work from home in a high level position, have a five year old wiht adhd and a fifteen month old, who I can only afford to put into childcare twice a week, so trying to balance everything can be pretty tough.
Over the last week I got hit by flu, so am really struggling and the ds's have both been ill as well. He goes out every thursday and I asked him to stay in and help - told me I didnt look that ill and went out. Not great, and not happy but thought "no leave it"..
Friday marginally better but found him on fb making comments to the effect of "oh prettyfly has a slave and prettyfly never gets up early in the morning but prettyfly can have whatever she wants on mothers day" - cue lots of comments from my friends about how great he is and how lucky I am to have him. Thing is this isnt even true - I pay seventy five percent of the household bills and do the majority of childcare and housework. He gets up an hour earlier then me every day because he has too - I get the kids ready for school and do pretty much everything else.
Saturday he picked up his dss and then went over to his mothers with the children. I got my nails done, for the first time in about three years, then came home, did the housework and got on with my work. Later that night he bitched at me for taking the hour to myself, then when I got annoyed said he was joking and was glad I had it. By this point my own flu was really getting worse so left it.
Yesterday kids come in, give me presents, all lovely. Come downstairs at ten thirty (bliss) to find another post to my friends on facebook saying "its ten thirty shall I venture upstairs to wake it up" and when my sister made a comment to the effect of yes go and get her he put "no I wouldnt dare". Again left it. Part of me thinks "you got the lie in, just make the most of it" but the other part is getting really angry that on the rare occasions that he does do nice things for me,I almost have to pay for it by accepting bitching or embarrassment, publically.
By last night was really, really unwell, which is totally unlike me. DP refused point blank when I asked to make dinner, then started moaning at me to eat something two hours later and offering to cook, by which point it was nearly nine o clock and I just didnt want anything. Went to bed.
This morning, woke up, could barely move, head screaming, chest hurting from the coughing etc. Would not dream of asking DP to take day off as last time I did that he was horrible and to be fair telling your boss "my dp is ill so I am not coming in does look shit" so started to get up and get myself ready, at which point he comes in the room and starts with "ooh look it has arisen" in a shreiky loud voice. Had enough and tell him to fuck off.
He then goes to work with the buggy in the car again. Ask him to bring it back for lunchtime as cannot carry fifteen month old around today (works five minutes away so not a big ask). Get text back " you asked me to get your car keys you did not remind me to get the buggy out of the car so its your fault and no".
AIBU to think he is being a dick now and should really be a bit kinder and more supportive. I very rarely get ill with anything and whilst he doesnt do nothing I just want someone to be fucking nice to me. The irony is that my five year old son asked if I was poorly this morning and when I said yes but I am fine so dont worry, said "mummy I think I should stay home and look after you". I felt like crying, gave him a cuddle, said thanks and sent him to school. Just wish my partner could be a little bit kinder.