need to tell ds mummy and daddy are no longer together

[winnie]

... however this is complicated by 1) we've not been living together for the last 6 months anyway (but we have continued having a relationship and being a family) & 2) I still love my husband and he says he still loves me.

I am confused (and utterly heartbroken) and my husband is going around and around in circles with his emotions but whereas a week ago we did family things (often) went to each others houses including staying over (often) and went out together without the children (often) I can barely speak to him and I don't want to be near him he has hurt me so much. However, we know we have to tell ds (5) something.

I don't want to say "Mummy and Daddy don't love each other anymore" as I know this is not true on my part. I obviously can't say "Daddy is being a ---- and we can't be together any more" and because we've been living apart the different houses thing will be meaningless.

Any ideas/experiences? Is it enough to say "Mummy and Daddy are not getting along at the moment, we both love you very much but we can't be together anymore"?

winnie what about that mummy and daddy need to have some space and time away from eachother, mummy and daddy are just not getting along at the mo

that you still both love eachother and him most important of all

I am thinking of you
hugs
xxx

Thanks doormat. Not sure I want to tell ds that we still love each other that may give us all false hope but I am beginnig to go with the idea of we need some spaceand time away etc...

I have said to my kids winnie that I love daddy and always will but that I dont much like him at the moment! Because I dont like him I need some space and time away and I cant be friends with him either.

I would never presume to speak for my dh he is big enough and ugly enough to tell them himself. I also had to tell them that there were things he had done which were not right because they wanted to know why we had tried again and then suddenly I had chucked him out of my life. THey had seen us apart but together IFYSWIM and needed to know why.

reassure ds r that he is loved and that he will see his daddy (will he?)

Message withdrawn

thanks guys.
ggglimpopo, I hadn't thought that ds may know what is going on and think that may be a useful starting point.
auntymandy, yes ds will be having lots of contact with daddy (he is with him now).

glitterfairy, I am not goin gto speak for h but we had agreed we would come to an agreement about what we do say. However, last night h said that he thought we shouldn 't say anything yet and that we need to talk. So not sure whats going on in his head now...

It is so hard. Ds went last night and is coming back this evening and I have loads to do as we are moving in Nov but I miss him terribly

Miss h too ... but thats another story

He was told today and he completely ignored us
Feel completely crucified right now