dh and I have been together a long time. I've namechanged and been on mumsnet a long time (years) and would say we are older than most couples on here.
Dh, as a child and into adulthood, never moved house (until he left home when he got a job after university). He only went to 2 schools (one primary, one secondary). Everything about his parents says order and discipline and routine. They have their meals at the same time, they have always had a cleaner. They are incredibly set in their ways.
As dh is getting older, I'm finding that he's getting more and more resistant to change. Both of us work full time but we've never had a cleaner. That's not to say we haven't necessarily needed one but our children are quite old and perfectly capable of contributing to the house by doing a few chores and I wanted them not to grow up being lazy children (I also pull my weight as would dh after a bit of reminding but I know he didn't like it). After much pleading from dh, I finally agreed we could have one at the start of the year and he said last night 'ah this is much better, just what I am used to' and he's completely stopped doing anything because his whole life he never had to lift a finger and that's the way he wants it to continue.
That's a silly example but it's an example of what I mean. It's like he can't wait to morph into his parents!
Another example is that we desperately need to move house. The house we are in is tiny and has no garden. It's adequate, totally adequate and I'm not complaining about the size but we had planned to look at moving around this time. Well he has completely vetoed this even to the extent of going to speak to my friends so that they could convince me not to move ffs! I said to him what is your problem! And he admits he just hates even the thought of change and wants things exactly the way they are. He said when it's inflicted on him he's ok with it but he can't think about changing!
ARRRGGHHH. If you are married to someone like this, how do you cope?