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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I doing this backwards?

7 replies

GreatBallsOfFluff · 27/03/2011 21:31

I met a man about a month ago at a mutual friend's birthday drinks. Right from the off he made it known that he was interested in me and to be honest I was a bit scared as it's been 5 years since my ex and I broke up (DD's dad). I said that if anything was to happen, I wanted to go really slowly and he has been totally one hundred percent respectful of that. He is also very understanding of the fact that DD comes first in everything. So far it's been mainly coffees during our lunch breaks (he lives about 50 miles away but works in the same city as me) and one night out when DD was at her dad's house. DD is at her dad's house again next Saturday night, but I've been very neglectful of my friends lately too due to moving to a more demanding job therefore being more tired at the weekends.

I've invited my three best friends over next Saturday. The main issue is that they're all male (in sort of a big brothers type way), and we have a bit of a juvenile night in when they do come over i.e. play monopoly, play on the Wii etc. I'd like to invite this man over to join us, and know that he probably wouldn't have issue with what we do during the evening as he's a big xbox player, but I'm not sure if this is all a bit backwards in that we haven't established what 'we're' actually doing and think that it might be a bit strange to introduce him to my friends.

What do you all think? He knows that I have mainly male friends and I have mentioned our 'Monopoly and Wii' nights to him before, but would it be strange to invite him too?

I know I'm probably making too big an issue of this than it is but it's been so long since I've done all this that I've forgotten how it works.

Also, if I don't see him on Saturday night, then it will be another two weeks until DD is at her dad's again to see him in an evening where it's not a rushed lunch break.

OP posts:
Hassled · 27/03/2011 21:33

Invite him and have a laugh. I think it'll be a good test of whether or not he's a keeper, tbh. Certainly nothing "going backwards" about it.

GreatBallsOfFluff · 27/03/2011 21:44

Thanks Hassled, just wasn't sure if we should establish what we're doing before I introduce him to my friends. But I think you're right in that it will be good to be in a chilled social environment with him.

OP posts:
AKissIsNotAContract · 27/03/2011 21:51

I think it's a great idea to invite him. How he gets along with your friends will tell you lots about his personality.

GreatBallsOfFluff · 27/03/2011 21:53

I never thought of it that way AKiss (although it's the most obvious thing it just never occurred to me Blush )

Thanks, I think I will invite him and see how it goes Smile

OP posts:
WMDinthekitchen · 28/03/2011 00:39

Fluff, you can all have a real laugh and you can impress him with your Wii skills! Sounds like a fun, relaxed evening and with stuff that all boys enjoy!!

BertieBotts · 28/03/2011 00:43

I think you should invite him too but not think that it means anything - or that you have to categorise what "it" is just yet. Hope you enjoy the evening - sounds fun :)

DanFmDorking · 28/03/2011 13:48

If your new chap doesn't want to come along next Saturday -
can I come? can I come? can I come?
please, please, please,
I want to play - please - please - can I come?

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