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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

STD tests after affair

8 replies

lostinthejungle · 15/03/2011 19:41

Hello again everyone. Have already posted all over the place about my discovery 2 weeks ago of husband's affair. Here's a very practical question: what STD tests need to be done to make sure we are all clear?

He went to the Red Cross and got their panel of blood tests done. Apparently these are comprehensive and quality blood tests.

A doctor friend told us that he didn't need anything else as long as there were no symptoms (last intercourse - allegedly always protected - in 2nd week of Jan approx). But I'm wondering about urine/swab tests still.

Also, I see web instructions that both partners need to be tested. Scuse my immense ignorance if that's the case, but I'm not clear why I would need to be tested if he is all clear on everything, particularly given that events are 2 months past?

Thanks ladies!

OP posts:
IngridBergmann · 15/03/2011 19:45

I don't know...our local clinic tests a swab for gonorrhoea and chlamydia, and a blood sample for HIV and syphilis.

They don't test for Hepatitis, or HPV or herpes (can't unless you have an active outbreak I think).

Sorry you are worried about this. HIV antibodies can take up to three months to develop/show up in a blood sample so he should be retested for that in a month or two.

LittleMissHissyFit · 15/03/2011 19:49

There is a swab test, basically they insert a swab under the foreskin to test for something... You need to get him to have this test too.

LittleMissHissyFit · 15/03/2011 19:52

There is a swab test, basically they insert a swab under the foreskin to test for something... You need to get him to have this test too.

Have you actually seen these results first hand?

I'd be surprised if the sex WAS always protected tbh

LittleMissHissyFit · 15/03/2011 19:53

gonorrhoea and chlamydia symptoms don't always present.

hobbgoblin · 15/03/2011 19:56

Think you'd need to be tested too for things that can be carried but possibly not contracted by the carrier iyswim. Swab tests also important as well as bloods. Does Chalmydia show up in the carrier if they are not symptomatic I wonder? If so, you could contract it and end up with PID even though he tested negatively. I don't know if I'm correct but this is why I suspect you would need to be tested too. Also for peace of [yourwon] mind.

dignified · 15/03/2011 20:57

Theres no such thing as protected intercourse , you can still contract warts or herpes ect. Id want to see these test results . Did you not go with him ?

ratspeaker · 15/03/2011 21:23

I take it you are not in the UK
If you were a GUM clinic would be the best place to go to ask questions and get yourself checked

Have you any idea what the Red Cross clinic tested for?
Do you trust him to have told you the truth re the results?

Inertia · 15/03/2011 22:18

He's had an affair, he has a history of lying to you. Therefore, there is no reason at all that you should believe that he has a) had only protected sex b) had the all-clear from the tests c) even had the tests in the first place.

Presumably he has , at some point, lied about every other aspect of the affair; he could well be lying about this. Best to get tests done for yourself too so that any potential issues can be sorted quickly.

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