Please Help - I think my DH left me last night - I dont know what to do

[busybusybee]

title says it all really

Hiya, don't have any answers, just wanted to send you a hug. (And give your dh a virtual slap, if that's ok)

sorry to hear what you are feeling,, my dp left me and 2 girls in June, I wanted to work to save it but he didnt feel it was worth saving, it has been horrible for us all, extreamley painful but you will get through it and slowly day be day i feel better, (still find sundays awful though) You have to find some strength from somewhere, and concentrate on what you want, and make time for yourself,

I think he has been pretty bad to say this to you and then just to go off, rather than stay to talk it through, you must be feeling very confused, and abandoned, i really feel for you,

Keep posting on here it definetely helped me,
all the best xx

bbbee, I'm so sorry - no advice I'm afraid, but just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you

Update!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wonderful news!

dh walked back in yesterday lunchtime -about 1 O'Clock
I was so shocked I was crying and almost having a panic attack!
His first words were "I have bought us a car!"
I said who exactly is us????????????????????
I couldnt quite believe he meant me and him
When i realised he really was back I picked up DS who is 4 and disappeared to cuddle him and cry quietly
DH had no idea what to do
Then we talked and i discovered the truth

OMG i am so happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Turns out he didnt go to "her". In fact he has never been to her house. Neither has he done anything with her except kiss and cuddle on the few occasions that they met. They talked on the telephone a couple of times a week.

He said it wasnt a sexual thing. It was about having someone to talk to who made him feel important!

Yesterday all i did was cry - today i am so relieved - Its so bizarre how ones life can alter so quickly

I'm really pleased to hear this BBB. I hope things work out for you and the family.

glad it is positive.

But take it as a warning - try and get some space to talk with DH - work out what is important for each of you, work out what is good and what is not good about your current situation. Work out some rules - what you will each do if things start to go wrong over anything - work out some agreed lines of communication, distress signals, and strategies for dealing with things before they get bad.

Try and make sure this is the first step to greater trsut between you, don't ignore it.

glad to hear this bbb, so happy for you
i agree with throckholt advise
spnd some quality time with your dh

busybusybee i am sooo pleased for you, make sure you keep talking.

Sorry, I missed this BBB.
Glad to hear things are better now.

Now you can talk, talk, talk - a luxury he denied you all day yesterday. I would want a promise that if he ever feels so bad again he will give you a chance to talk it over before he walks out and leaves you worried half to death. I'd forgive, certainly, but I'd want him to understand that I can't read minds and that communication is a two-way process.

I hope things get better for you now. xxx

Throckenholt and Anorak + others - Thankyou so much for you thoughtful replies - Im thinking of printing out your advice so i can read it again and again

Which probably sounds silly but im so desparate for this not to happen again. We have been married for 6 years, life without him would be unbearable - Id be homeless and jobless for a start - long story!

At the moment I feel relieved, but im really aware that i might feel a whole bunch of negative emotions in the next few weeks/months

The first thing dh and i are going to do is spend more QUALITY time together. Im also determined to appreaciate him more and listen more. He is under instruction to show me affection on a daily basis

thankyou so much MN - your support really helped

Glad to hear things seem to be more positive for you ATM, BBB.
Are you someone who used to post quite a bit on my old thread?

Yes SM - And i feel truly weird that you are posting on mine because your DH gives you so much hassle - My dh is lovely really - except when hes being a wally of course

Mine is still being a nightmare, to say the least!
Think I have an idea who you are, now.
Did your old name start with an L?

No SM but i think i know who you mean though!! My name started with a letter much nearer the end of the alphabet...

Hmmmm, you have me stuck now!
Make sure he looks after you now, anyway!