How do you move forward after an affair

[anon1968]

He ended it and we are trying to work it out but i can not stop questioning him about where he is going etc. I know I'm not to blame but I know I'm going to push I'm away if I can't stop it.he answered all my questions at the time but I'm not sure if I have hurt myself more by asking things. How do you stop your mind rushing with things and how do I move on. I'm scared that when think things are going ok that I'm just sticking my head in the sand. It's almost as though if I think he's still carrying the affair on then it won't hurt as much this time. Any advice. I do follow the other posts on here but just would like some advice on how to get past this

Bumping for you.

When I found out my H was still having an affair, 4 months after he promised me it had ended, it didn't hurt as much. Because the period in between had erroded almost everything I felt for him.

Your H needs to accept your questioning and suspicions as a consequence of what he's done, and do everything he can to help you. If he can't you might not get over this properly.

I think I've seen a few of your threads about this OP, but as I recall, you don't stick around long enough or come back to the thread to get all the answers you need, so the thread dies.

There's also not very much to go on in your OP, but I'd hazard a guess that you don't feel he's fully committed to your romantic relationship and doesn't fully regret the affair. Perhaps you're not sure he ended it for the right reasons? Perhaps you're not sure that it's you he wants, rather than the DCs, the house and all the trappings?