Feeling flat today

[ginnyjeans]

Just don't know what to do with myself, and that's probably the problem.

Was just in the car and thought 'wow, can't believe what a different person I am to 2 years ago. Can't believe all that's happened and to think I thought I had a good marriage etc.'. Divorce coming through in 2-ish weeks. Am pleased about that now, can honestly say that.

I met such a fantastic guy beginning Jan and unfortunately it didn't work out as he is just coming out of a long term marriage too and he really isn't ready for anything serious and I can't stop thinking about him. He was so full on and intense with me and I loved being with him and getting to know him. I'm 35 for goodness sake. Why can't I just let it go!

I've got such a crap load to sort out through dickhead stbxh and the distraction was wonderful. But real life kinda sucks - I've a lot to wade through. And I cant seem to start.

Does anyone else feel like this? I actually feel like crying now - maybe it's just my hormones. Ok - here come the tears.

Oh - and BTW - I really didn't have a good marriage. I just convinced myself I did. What an idiot!

didnt want your post to go unanswered, youve had one good post seperation relationship no reason why you cant have another you've obviously still got what it takes take a look in the mirror give your self a great big smile and get out there and strutt your stuff, think about it in a couple of weeks you're be able to call your self single how brilliant is that, I know how you feel went through it a few years ago, crying by the way is good it releases those crap toxins leaving more room for other better tasting toxins

when i got divorced in 1988 "the only way is up" was No 1, just kept thinking that, it helped

It's no wonder you feel flat - you're probably starting to go through a grieving process. You're glad to be getting divorced but it's still a huge adjustment - you have to let go of the life you expected to have and your illusions about your marriage being happy. Do you want to talk about why you divorced?

Let yourself feel down for a while - it's all part of the big change you're going through. Be kind to yourself, try to treat yourself if you can.

I feel a bit like this too so dont have advice but will be watching . I try and get how you can be glad the marriage is over but flat and empty at the same time

Thanks everyone. Gettingeasier - I'm feeling flat about my short lived romance! Really liked this guy. And btw, before the new guy, had only ever slept with my husband, so was a big thing for me.

Re the marriage, I'm not pleased I had a failed one but I think I've put all that behind me. Just sat in the drive thinking about the person I was 2 years ago as opposed to now. It has been an adjustment for sure. And back then I had a friend going through divorce and felt smug (not in a bad way) that my marriage was ok and at least we loved each other (or so I thought) despite the fact that my husband was very lazy, selfish and didn't do anything for the family (the things I overlooked).

I do have an uphill battle as I need to figure out what I am going to do workwise, future wise, child wise, and debt wise (as stbxh has left me with all that! and there's no point even going after him for anything as he isn't working properly) and that's scary.

Ginny sorry I should have been clearer its me who is glad my marriage is over yet feels flat !!

Yes me too re the future apart from I dont have debts, it can feel scary to say the least but at least I am living authentically now and not as xhs doormat

oh bless you. I am sorry you feel rubbish and low.
It's best to let it out, you can't be on top of everything and super happy when you are feeling disappointment and loss.

I have been feeling that way today, just flat.

I hope you have a nice sleep and feel a bit better tomorrow xx

Thanks everyone.

I've just deleted my short lived romance's number from my phone, all his cute texts I saved, all email and gmail chats, because I've been obsessing over how it's all over when it was all so lovely and full on and he gave me every indication he was serious. Not having it there to remind me will be good.

He wants us to stay friends, but like someone said, you can't really when you want more can you. On with life!

Yes - flat. As a puncture.

hard to delete stuff yes. but it's gone now and you don't have to carry it all round. time was right for you to do that. little steps.