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Original poster

How doesn Msn Chat work

26 replies

justwaitaminute · 02/03/2011 23:11

Can anyone tell me how Msn chat works, can you speak to people that you don't know or them contact you? or can you only speak to people if you know their email address?

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:12

You can only add people if you know their email address. Or if they know yours.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 02/03/2011 23:13

Or any other kind of chat actually, yahoo etc

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:13

You can also block anyone you don't want contacting you.

Is this for a child/teenager? You might want to know you can set it to save conversations automatically as well.

BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:15

Yahoo is the same although I think yahoo still have chat rooms where you can chat with strangers.

Google talk is similar to msn in that you can only add those you know.

Usually they aren't compatible with each other so a teenager will want to use the one all their friends are on.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 02/03/2011 23:16

just wondering as my dp said he was chatting to a girl, she contacted him apparently, but she must have had his email then, interesting, thanks bertie

OP posts:
Original poster
justwaitaminute · 02/03/2011 23:18

maybe it was a chat room then, makes it slightly better I think Hmm

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:20

Oh I see, slightly different situation I guess.

Yes she must have got his email from somewhere. If he has ever posted it on a website she could have got it from there, so he might not have passed it on directly. Still he would have had a popup saying "X wants to add you. Do you want to allow them to contact you?" and you click yes, or block.

It could be innocent if he is sociable and wanted to find out where she'd got his address from or wanted to check whether it was anyone he knew before he blocked them.

BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:21

If it was yahoo, it could have been a chat room yes. MSN chat rooms though have been gone for about 8 years over paedophile fears I think.

Do you want to talk about it? You don't sound happy about this.

manticlimactic · 02/03/2011 23:22

I thought they closed msn chat down years ago!

There is (or was) msn chat where it's like a chat room and then there MSN Messenger (or live messenger as it's called now). Two different things. For messenger you need their email address unless you have a public profile and then I think you can contact and add people.

Been a while since I used it though.

BertieBotts · 02/03/2011 23:24

I assumed the OP was talking about msn messenger/windows live messenger, yahoo messenger etc.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 02/03/2011 23:25

Its a long story but it started apparently about 18 months ago when he said he was chatting to some girl for the evening, I just presumed that it was Msn chat but maybe it was in a chat room. would he know her name if it was chat room??

and actually she must know his email address because she requested him to join/talk to her on Adult friend finder last week.

Need to get my head around it all, but it is hard as I've never used any chat sites/room etc

OP posts:
PurpleOne · 03/03/2011 05:22

adult friend finder is a sex site where people meet up for sex.

sorry, i thnk you need to divulge and delve further with this.

BertieBotts · 03/03/2011 06:58

Well basically, there are three or four types.

Forums - like mumsnet - where you can leave a message and then come back and see who has replied. Usually open to the public or to members only.

Social network sites - like facebook, adult friend finder (I'm sorry but I agree with PurpleOne on this - does not sound good :() semi-open ie you add friends but can add strangers as well.

Chat rooms - largely obsolete now. They are a bit like forums, mumsnet etc except all the typing is in real time so you see everything people are saying. This will usually be strangers. You can request a private chat with someone on this kind of thing.

Instant messaging - msn messenger, yahoo messenger etc. You need someone's email address for this. The yahoo one is linked with the chat rooms so if you met someone in a chat room you can add them as a "contact" which means you wouldn't have to know their address.

But I think you have bigger problems than whether it's a chat room or a private messaging service if he's on AFF. Sorry :(

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 07:44

Ok tell me what you think

his computer is normally locked now but he went out the other day and left it open, I had a snoop and went through his history, about a week or so ago there was history for adult friend finder, so I clicked on it and it brought up his profile, it had a recent picture of himself on it!!

There wasn't much info on it but in the bit about yourself he had just written

'Looking for (girls name) We spent an evening together last summer, never did get to finish cooking the spaghetti bolognaise!! lol xx txt/call me this site is doing my head in'

So when I asked him who she was he said he didn't know (classic defence) I then took him to his computer and shown him his profile. and just said tell me the truth......

He says that they were just chatting a year of so ago for the evening, I had pissed him off and so when he started chatting to her he had responded, he can't remember how they started chatting Hmm

So when he received an email a week ago with her name on it wanting to chat he clicked on it to respond and it took him to AFF

he set up a profile just to talk to her..... the thing I found strange and he can't understand my thinking is why would you bother uploading a photo just for some random girl from a year or so ago, doesn't make sense. also why say that they had spent any evening together, he says its because they were chatting for the evening

Really not sure what to think, if he had met her then surely she would have his mobile number but then again how would she have his email in order to invite him.

I really want to know how he first started chatting to her in order to determine how she would have his email but as far as his concerned he's told me what happened and if I don't believe him then thats my problem really.

So what are your thoughts on this?

OP posts:
RealityIsKnockedUp · 03/03/2011 07:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 07:53

Thats one of my many thoughts reality, lets face it, if she's a nice girl on the net to chat to blokes, she's not going to be registered on AFF is she!

anyway he couldn't find her, he's too tight to pay the subscription so that you can search for people, I guess that he was hoping she would find him!!

OP posts:
throckenholt · 03/03/2011 07:56

my thoughts :

very suspicious - his excuses don't add up. Some long term issue here that you seem to have been unaware of (or maybe not if you were snooping ?).

as far as his concerned he's told me what happened and if I don't believe him then thats my problem really.

I think this is what he is hoping you will believe.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 08:01

Yes definately, most of his excuses don't add up and this certainly doesn't.....

He doesn't remember anything..... so for him to remember this girls name from over a year ago then she must of been memorable.....

Just don't know how to get the truth

OP posts:
Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 10:50

maybe I just need to get rid of him, I probably never will know the truth and really don't want to tie myself up in knots trying to find it!

OP posts:
QueeferSutherland · 03/03/2011 11:25

Do you have children together, justwait? I think you do need to get rid. I'm not sure you will get the truth from him.Sad

Honestly? This sounds baaaad.

I'm with Reality, I'm afraid.

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 11:31

I have 3 children but only 1 with him, a baby, he did change when I got pregnant (when I wanted more commitment) although he was pleased I was. we don't live together (lots of reasons, valid ones) now I'm just thinking that's he's just not cut out for a proper relationship,

I just feel that, he wants to be with me so he can see his DS and I'm sure he loves me (in his own kind of way) but he's just very selfish, wants to have his cake and eat it, iyswim

OP posts:
dickiedavisthunderthighs · 03/03/2011 12:18

This is rotten for you but you sound incredibly balanced and strong.
He sounds like he's lying to you but not terribly successfully.
Yet another man-child.

JustForThisOne · 03/03/2011 12:23

he has either lost her phone number or she has changed it and he is desperate to get back in contact with her, so he has created a new profile (maybe met there one year ago?) in the hope she will get back in touch

what's not to understand from the msg in his profile?

squeakytoy · 03/03/2011 12:27

"we spent the evening together" does not sound to me like a cyber evening..

sorry :(

Original poster
justwaitaminute · 03/03/2011 12:33

possibly, well the way I see it is, he must of either spent the evening in her company or bonking her online!!

Either way he's a twat, the thought of him is making me feel queasy now.

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