I've realised that my dh is a fundamentally horrible person and I need a plan of action to deal with it.
I'm due to give birth to our first child next month, and we have just moved house to an isolated rural location, so I'm feeling quite trapped and unable to just get up and go.
Basically he has been unbearable throughout my whole pregnancy, and I have excused it each time, as I knew he was stressed looking for a new job which he has now found, which is why we have moved.
The trouble is, as I knew at the time, each time I excused his bad behaviour, it set a precedent, meaning it was no poblem if he did it again. Basically he was stressed, and he came home and took it out on me big time, calling me thick, useless and pathetic. Totally ironic given that he can't spell, I've got a much better degree than him, and had a better job also.
Now he has started his new job, managing a team for the first time, and within a month, one of his team has told him he wants to leave, mainly because he doesn't like working for him! He told me that last night, and my first thought was, hopefully that will be a wake-up call and you will see you will need to change the way you deal with people. But then a few seconds later I thought, oh no, he's going to take it out on me. And he did, looking for any excuse. First he was angry because he thought I had done nothing all day - despite the fact I'm on maternity leave and had cleaned the whole house and made his tea. Then he realised he couldn't find something and went mental at me, even though I didn't know where it was either.
Then last night and this morning he started making a mess of the whole house, tipping things out of containers and spreading it across the floor. My friends are coming to visit for the weekend, and he knows I'll need to spend the whole day on my hands and knees picking things up. Which is hard to do when you're about to give birth. And he took the car, meaning that I'll need to walk to the supermarket and carry back all the food for the weekend. And he said I couldn't have the car to pick my friends up from the airport tonight. So I'll need to ask them to get a taxi. And he probably won't come to our parenting class tomorrow to punish me for whatever it is he's angry about. Leaving me humiliated in a room full of happy couples.
He left this morning shouting 'your useless' about 100 times. Totally distressing the baby who was kicking like crazy. I can't even be bothered fighting him anymore.
I had previously said he just needs to say anything derogatory once to me once the baby is born, and our whole marriage is over. I have a feeling he will say something bad straight away, and I need the courage to carry through what I've threatened, as I don't want my child to disrspect me.