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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Not coping...

2 replies

sunshineleah · 22/02/2011 23:37

Hi all,
DP and I have had a rough year all things told - not relationship-wise, but in almost every other area of life!

Things like him being out of work, FIL being ill, money worries, car breaking down etc etc have all put a massive strain on us both, which had impacted on our relationship to some extent.

We thought things were getting better and we were getting onto a more even keel, DP found a job, and some other things resolved themselves.

However, we have just been put into a position where we need to move - we were sharing with another couple, but they have split so we need to find our own place.

This seems to have brought things to a head - we will be able to manage, but only barely. Neither of us really wants to leave our home, but it's unavoidable. DP is hating his job, but can't properly look for something else until we are settled.

I am really struggling in this situation - DP is unhappy all the time and it is rubbing off on me. I try to be positive, but found out today that that upsets him more as he feels he is alone in his misery (he's not but I can't give in to my misery or I'll not stop, need to be positive to get through IYSWIM?)

Tonight we had a massive disscussion (and lots of tears from me) which didn't really resolve anything and I just feel worn out, physically and emotionally,
:( I don't know what to do...

OP posts:
LittleMissHissyFit · 22/02/2011 23:57

Keep talking to each other, you are both scared, both unhappy, worried. Remind him that you are a team, both doing what needs to be done to get through this.

Tell him that you are putting on a brave face because you have to. Things can't beat you like that.

Hope you find somewhere great. Things like this usually happen for a reason, who knows you might just land on your feet and it'll be better than you could possibly imagine.

zikes · 22/02/2011 23:58

All I can suggest is keep talking, explain that you have to cope in your way but it doesn't mean you're not feeling it too. I hope you find somewhere nice to live soon and that things start looking better.

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