I posted here recently here about how my relationship had turned very badly over the last 2/3 years >> www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1138948-Really-need-some-other-views-on-my-dreadful-life.
On advice from here I stopped relationship counselling cos he couldn't stop lying and turning things round on me and I've started personal counselling- next session tonight.
When I explained that I needed to stop the relationship counselling to sort out my own head, he threw his key back at me and told me he didn't love me. In the space of two weeks he went from loving me/adoring me, to loving me in an odd sort of way to not loving me at all.
I know from reading posts on here that he's playing games with my head but I suppose Im just wondering when it will stop - how long will it take not to hurt.
I've been keeping conversations only about the kids and he's been really indifferent about everything. Last Sunday he invited me to dinner with the kids but I declined politely pretending to be sick so no arguments and thought that things had eased a bit between us. However Friday night I had some friends over for dinner and at 1245 am my phone texted with him wanting to know
him - "who was the man at the bin 10 mins ago?"
me - dont know - didnt hear anything
him - was just passing on way home
him - are you out or in cos worried about house getting broken into
me - im home
him - good then goodnight
So move to Saturday morning and he texts
him - how are kids?
me - fine - btw what were you doing passing house at 1250am anyway?
him - whats it to u
me - only wondering why you didn't approach stranger in the garden - but no problem ( i know there was no-one in garden I was sitting near window)
him - thought you had a friend over!!
him - did you enjoy your night out?
So i ignored that text and then later on
him - what time is son's basketball match
me - cancelled
him - is it really cancelled or do you not want me to go - just dont want to out you as a liar in front of kids
me - forward text from coach
him - so did you enjoy night out
me - told you already wasnt out
him - just dont want you to make the kids have to lie in fear
Then i called and row ensued, apparently he had asked son if he was staying in his nans to which he replied no - cos we were staying in so hes accusing me of making the kids lie to him because they fear me!!!!
Then Sunday he arrives to collect DC. I had them ready and waiting. Off they went bowling. Then he's sending me texts and photos about how they're having a great time. Then this morning is the first time he doesnt text to see how the kids are!
I suppose I dont even really know what Im asking here. I still feel like I did at Christmas when he left -devastated.
Considering he's the one that was unfaithful/accused me of being unfaithful, how come its me that feels like im to blame?
And how come two weeks ago he claimed he loved me would do anything to come back and now doesnt love me at all.
I feel like Im taking one step forward - three back. When will it get any better? Why if he doesn't care about me is he still playing with my head?