How much money should I try to save before I leave dh?

[wanttobepractical]

I'm becoming more and more certain that my marriage is ending but I don't want to finish it without some money to fall back as I have two dc's under five and am currently a sahm. I have some cash insavings but not sure how much to try and save.

There would be equity from the house but obviously that wouldn't be available straight away and there is no way I could afford to keep the house on by myself.

I can't get my head straight to think of the practicalities of it all and ensuring security for the dc's is my top priority.

I would start slowly untagling yourself from him money wise

Bank accounts Ect

I would say you will probaly need to find a Jon first and secure child care as from April it will be very hard to claim benefits

I feel for you

This is my worry. I had started to make work plans but a childcare arrangement I had started to put in place has fallen through.

If I wait until both dc's are in school then that would make it easier but would mean keeping it together for another 18 months.

There is no abuse or massive rows so in that sense no urgency it's just a sad and sorry marriage now

save as much as you can, tax credits can take weeks to come through, and CM can take months to sort out,

maypole why april whats happening then?

Thanks maybe I need to look into evening work. I always imagined h would be fair and reasonable in the event of divorce but you never know and as my opinion of him slides so does my faith

Put any savings in your children's name with you as the person controlling it. Or get someone you trust to put it away for you. He could freeze any accounts in event of divorce.

It isn't going to stay very amicable for very long if he finds out you've been stashing money away is it?

best advice i was ever given....The man you divorce is not the same man you married.
I refinanced the house and took $10 k out,exh didnt notice and signed the papers( We were still married and living together but I knew it was over).i got the check from the refinance,cashed it and kept it in a friends safe.When the time came I had the money for a very good lawyer.
Its never pretty or easy but make sure youve got a enough stashed away that your not in a panic