sex life has disappeared

[branflakesareboring]

I have had to namechange because of embarrassment

DH and I don't have much sex only about once every 3 months or so. We've had some stress in the past years and have got out of the habit.

Last night we tried but I just couldn't get into it and it was uncomfortable and felt horrible. I couldn't get aroused at all and had to resort to lubricant I do love him but my body has just shut down in that department.

I don't know what to do. Is this normal? I've never had probs like this before and it's upsetting.

Oh Bless you branflakes! If you haven't made love for a long time then it may take a while for everything to start working again! And using lubricant is absolutely fine if it helps. all I can advise is that you give it another go, relax and don't put pressure on yourself. Could you maybe experiment with cuddles and oral sex to begin with? And then as the body starts to get used to it again, move to penetrative sex? If you have any worries, speak to your GP, there may be a physical reason that could be sorted. Keep trying though because leaving it for another three months I'm syre won't help matters. Good luck!

I did speak to my gp but she didn't seem very interested and just told me to search on the net about low sex drive. I wanted her to do some blood tests to check my hormone levels because I just have no drive whatsoever but she wasn't forthcoming.

Does anybody know what tests I could ask for because I'm sure there's something physical to this because even when I've been stressed I've still felt like it.

Are you on the pill branflake? when I was on the pill it totally killed off my sexdrive otherwise I would suggest what nutkins said :)

I'm not on the pill.

Hi Branflakes. Can you go back to a different doctor? If not try again with the same one and lay it on a bit thick and say that your relationship is at serious risk if you don't get it sorted. Telling you to look on the web is SOOO unacceptable! In the meantime, I would still try again with making love. As I said, just being intimate with each other at first may help, massage, cuddles, touching, kissing and see if you get aroused. I wonder if there is any emotional issues underlying this as you said that you have been stressed in the past? Are these issues resolved? Take care and I hope you can get this sorted.