A few weeks ago I found out that my partner of 23 years (we have 3 children) has been having an affair with a woman 15 years younger than him. He was apparently at the stage of their relationship when he was having to make a decision about who to be with. She is married with 2 young children. I have gone through his emails (don't normally pry but I felt that this needed it!)and it is clear from all of the correspondance between them that he was not at all sure about leaving me and our boys and that she was putting a lot of pressure onto him to leave us. When I finally confronted him about the affair he said that his choice was now clear and that he would have to leave me as how could I possibly ever have him back after what he'd done? I told him exactly why we should stay together, how we could build on our relationship (which has been unphysical for many years due to so many reasons). IAlthough I in no way condone what he did, I feel that I have been quite cold towards him, when he has tried so often to be close. He is a very physical person and I'm not so not being tactile towards each other was very significant to him in a way that it wasn't to me. We generally get on very well and many commment on what a good team we make. I just feel so bitter about what he did that I don't know if I can put it behind me. Before I even found out about the affair I made a New Year resolution to try to rekindle the physical side of our relationship, and now I feel that I'm back to square 1. DH is essentially a lovely guy. Good dad, v.(too) hard working and I should have show much more affection but how do I even start to get over this? He works with OW which I'm struggling with.