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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

dd loathes me

53 replies

humanheart · 22/01/2011 12:56

does 'relationships' include relationships with our kids?

dd is 25 and almost phobic about me. i can't understand why we can't just get on (but maybe I'm talking rubbish here). I'm not sure what to do as she constantly sets me up (I walk into it every time) and has a profound hatred for me. she knows what to do to cause me maximum pain and, as she sets the traps that I walk into each time, she looks the injured party. she has hurt me very much indeed - can't go into detail - yet her campaign shows no sign of abating: it looks like this is a pattern for life and she needs to scapegoat me in order to feel settled in herself. that may be ok for the short term but it definitely isn't ok for the long term - for either her or me.

she is psychologically vulnerable and now and again pulls out the "I'm going to kill myself" card. It is impossible not to respond as that is a terrifying prospect to me as a mother. I know she's got me dangling on the end of a piece of string but I have no idea how to alter the dynamic. I am dragged this way and that, she infects a wide circle with her hatred (of me), constantly setting me up. It seems that the only thing I can do to minimise the damage is to bow to her demands. I haven't so far but the pressure is unrelenting and I am getting ragged (though often resolute and ok too, not ultimately bowed by it), not to mention lacking in support (thin on the ground) as I do so look like the villain a lot of the time.

OP posts:
humanheart · 24/01/2011 19:17

no, I don't have a problem with that Valium. imo it is normal as are (all) feelings - it's how you deal with them that is important. i don't want to get into semantics but I'd rather my kids said it, acknowledged it, than it emanate out of their pores (toxic) or shame got knitted in to them somehow bcs of it. I also think kids are the experts on love, as well as hate - so clean about it.

feeling very very wobbly about dd today. as I have said previously, this condition (endured for over 25 years from ex, despite my [fruitless] efforts to get away) has engendered a lot of fear in me. I can't be swallowed up in the fear of this again, I have to normalise it (if that makes sense?). she is my girl, the sun goes around the planet like clockwork and there is nothing new under it. that's where I have to be for now, but appreciate the very kind feedback on this thread and will, as I said, print it up and probably come in for another bout when I've stabilised a bit. at the moment my heart feels like it's breaking, but there's something about that that doesn't feel quite right... I have to get stable about this. bcs of the past I have been almost entirely resistent to facing it again (thinking it was behind me) re my comment in my OP re don't understand why we can't just get on: I have been in denial. I have to find a balance between facing the truth and... hope, which will probably be a rocky road but I have to get my feet planted like the queen and steady myself to face it. iyswim. cover for me, I'm going in...

thank you all again for your very kind and thoughtful responses and support. means a lot.

OP posts:
Eurostar · 25/01/2011 00:26

How does she get on with life in general? Can she hold down a job? How are her own intimate relationships?

humanheart · 25/01/2011 08:51

she functions well - apart from crippling anxiety sometimes (often). she is very successful (but so was ex). she is in a very loving relationship.. with an addict (who is clean)

OP posts:
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