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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Pregnancy, how likely?!? :-(

16 replies

codsworth · 11/01/2011 07:03

DP has a habit of "rubbing himself" against me while we're in bed to try and convince me to have sex. On one occasion his penis did enter me but I shouted at him and moved away instantly.

Anyway the first day of my last period was the 12th December. A week ago I had SLIGHTLY tender breasts (not as much as normal) and a couple of days ago I went through my usual monthly "narky cow" mode but still no period. Am I right in thinking I should have started last Sunday?? There has been no spotting or anything. I used a tampton yesterday "just incase" whilst I was at work and when I took it out there wasn't a mark on it. I just can NOT have a baby right now. I'm stressing like hell over this.

OP posts:
Original poster
codsworth · 11/01/2011 07:04

Obv I'm not using any contraceptives other than condoms.

OP posts:
beingsetup · 11/01/2011 07:05

Very unlikely? It's late enough to try a pregnancy test though...

MummieHunnie · 11/01/2011 07:35

Shock at him entering you.

Yes it is possible if he was wanking just before, go and get a test.

Also Shock at putting tampon in before period, it must have been hell to get out?

CabbagefromaBaby · 11/01/2011 07:46

Really unlikely but just possible.

You might just be a couple of days late, it's very common.

You could always take a cheapy test today if you can get one.

Your partner sounds a bit strange in his persuasion tactics. Maybe it's time you had a chat about that? Emphasise that when you aren't interested he needs to respect that and not try and hump you like a dog or something, because it won't work and is very annoying.

I don't think it's advisable to use tampons when you're not bleeding because it can alter the vaginal chemistry and make you more likely to get a nasty infection.

How about a panty liner instead?

Good luck.

QueenStromba · 11/01/2011 12:18

Your DP really needs to learn about foreplay, that would put me right off sex and that's really saying something. If you're really worried about being pregnant then take a test, it's unlikely but at least it will put your mind at rest - stressing out about being late is likely to just make you later.

You really shouldn't be using tampons when you aren't actually bleeding (or even if you are bleeding lightly). It really increases the likelihood of getting toxic shock syndrome because it dries you out and leaves more fibers inside you (which is what causes TSS). I have a mooncup which is fantastic for when you think you are due to start - it's saved me many an evening running to the loo every five minutes because I think I've come on. You can also still use it for the last day where it is too light to use a tampon.

Original poster
codsworth · 11/01/2011 14:53

I'm so scared and anxious now. We're actually in the process of splitting up. I just cannot have a baby. I feel like crying. Still no sign of a period today. He said to me last night "even if you are, we shouldn't postpone you moving out, I don't want that dragging on until October" ffs he doesn't give a shit does he.
I don't know whether to give it to the end of the week or take a test now to confirm/put my mind at rest. I need to know ASAP for obvious reasons but I feel sick with worry.

OP posts:
madonnawhore · 11/01/2011 14:58

It makes me feel a bit ill to read in your post that he says such horrible things to you yet within the last month he's been trying to force you into sex.

What a rapey twat.

Do a test, put your mind at rest. I would say that while there's a slim possibility, it would be unlikely.

CabbagefromaBaby · 11/01/2011 16:29

codsworth, in your position (and I am SO relieved you are splitting up with this eejit, good on you) I wouldn't test, I would actually say no more about it, movce out ASAP and not let him know if I were pregnant or not. He sounds a right bloody git who will give you no end of trouble if you are.

His right to decisions regarding the baby would end NOW in my mind. But then I don't know him and he might have a good side...just you sound so worried and scared. What's holding you up with the moving?

Can you rush it along a bit? Just get away from him first and tHEN test or make decisions or whatever when you are somewhere safe, where you can think without panicking.

CabbagefromaBaby · 11/01/2011 16:31

What I mean is, whether you tell him or not, you shouldn't test until you are ready to face the possible decision a positive test would throw at you, iyswim.

wait till you are safely away from him, then start dealing with that side of things, else it might complicate the splitting up...which imo is crucial and a priority.

Hope that makes sense.

Northernlurker · 11/01/2011 16:36

He sounds awful. Why are you moving out though? Do you have children together?
I think it might be an idea to test actually. You're stressing yourself about this and there may be no need. If you are pregnant well it would be early days and you don't have to actually allow the pregnancy to continue. You can have a termination. If you are pregnant it's because this horrible man forced sexual contact on you. YOu didn't choose this, you don't want it. It's ok to feel like that and there are people who will understand and help you. You aren't the first woman to face this sort of situation and sadly you won't be the last.

CabbagefromaBaby · 11/01/2011 16:39

That's very true,

and if you are pregnant (though I am more leaning towards your period being late from the stress this bloke is giving you) and decide to have a termination, I really would keep it quiet.

Northernlurker · 11/01/2011 16:42

Absolutely. It's a totally personal matter - I would suggest you don't discuss it with him at all. His behaviour suggests he will be of no help and support whatsoever.

susiedaisy · 11/01/2011 16:57

yeah i agree, do a test for you and then if its positive sit down and think what you want for you, dont give any consideration for that twatt, he sounds like he will just make your life a misery for years, i mean if you are preg fancy havin to explain (maybe in the future) oh yeah DC you were conceived by your dad sticking his penis in me when i wasnt looking/expecting it!! FFS

CabbagefromaBaby · 11/01/2011 17:33

I only suggest waiting to test as I know that if I test without wanting to be pregnant, I fall apart waiting for the result and I know if it were positive I would not cope well.

So maybe OP if you know you'll take it badly if it's a positive, you might want to wait till you are on your own or at least have someone else with you who will support you through the scary bit.

Original poster
codsworth · 13/01/2011 07:29

Ok I did a test and it came negative. Still not started a period though!? there was a tiny, tiny bit of blood yesterday but it was fresh blood (pink) and it was just a speck on the bogroll.

No idea what's going on, it's very unusual for me to miss a period Sad

OP posts:
Decorhate · 13/01/2011 07:38

If you are stressed (which is likely given your circumstances) you can miss a period.

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