My DH has a lot in common with my Mother. They are both sullen when at home with the family, but the moment someone else comes, they come alive and are fun, amusing, hospitable and love being the centre of attention. Both blossom, as if their lights were being switched on, when an attractive member of the opposite sex appears. Both are the life and soul of any social gathering. Both are flirtatious. Neither has or wants, friends of their own sex. My father was considered a miserable unhappy man because he was always quiet when out with my Mother. We, his children, considered him her victim and despised him a bit for his apparent weakness. He was a sweet, long suffering man without whom my childhood would have been hell. My parents were very close, even though my father suffered both verbal and physical abuse from my mother. My husband is never physically abusive, but can be verbally aggressive and vengeful. He is financially generous and a caring father. He loves shopping and cooking. He even cleans the kitchen. On the surface, he appears a good husband. I don't want to be considered a victim like my Father was. How on earth did I marry someone so like my Mother? Can anyone shed some light? Offer some advice?