Supporting an older male friend

[HappyBeingExploited]

Name changed for this, though I mostly lurk anyway. I am happily married with DC. I worked for the same (male) boss for many years until he had to take early retirement to care full-time for his wife with early Alzheimers. We got on very well in our working days - I'm pretty sure he fancied me but hardly ever let it show (he is 20 years my senior). He now e-mails almost daily and is much more affectionate than ever before, though he says he is aware I am definitely off-limits. I know he has been celibate for years due to his situation and is quite lonely though a devoted carer. I can't ever imagine me and him having a physical relationship though I think for him it is already an EA. I quite enjoy the flirtatious chat TBH and see it as something I'm prepared to do to support him simply as a friend. Is this wise or am I building up trouble for myself?

only if you don't tell you husband. I'm not saying your husband has to know every word...but you know what I mean!

I think you know probably that it is on shaky ground tbh.

I have been in similar (though not the same) situations and it is always best to keep boundaries clear before you end up really having to withdraw and thus upsetting him more than is necessary.

Good luck, you will need it - but gently ease off.

I haven't set any formal boundaries but I think he knows implicitly that they are there - for instance I don't reply to each and every one of his e-mails and although he calls me by a variety of pet names I never do the same in return. I am truly fond of him but I don't want to log on one day to an undying declaration of everlasting love from a man old enough to be my dad!

Lydwatt - forgot to say that DH knows we correspond, though not the detail (and is not too bothered, not seeing him as a potential suitor!). They know each other a bit professionally anyway - we all work in similar fields.

Sounds to me like its all fine then, at the moment. Keep listening to your uneasy voice though and perhaps mention to dh that you are a little worried about how depenadant on you lonely bloke may become on your email chats. He could help and take him out for a blokey thing now and again?
you sound like a good friend