if you wanted to leave your husband but had

[devonsmummy]

no family or friends to stay with where would you go?

Totally depends on the situation. Why are yo leaving him? You say yo have no family or friends, is this because he has been controlling you? Or have you moved country to be with him?

Sorry, letter 'u' is sticky on my keyboard.

Women's aid if you are being abused, if not and you just want to leave talk to him like an adult and sort something out from joint finances.

close family abroad other family/friends no space.no abuse - just cant live like this forever

Do you have children and, if so, how old are they and who is their primary carer?

4 and just over 1 and yep primary carer

Can you talk to DH? Are you just worried you are going to chicken out if you speak to DH?

im the primary carer - sorry

Can you get him to leave?

Where are you? How are you financially?

would obviously have to speak to him first but like to know my options

we own a house and im not working SAHM
so wouldnt be able to stay put
i have no income or savings

There's not a lot of help we can give unless we know more details.

Not sure you can know your options without speaking to DH tbh. If you have joint finances you would have to work out the break up together but you seem very reluctant to speak about it which makes me wonder if you are frightened of him in some way... Perhaps just not sure you are going to leave and trying to keep it secret?

Do you have any assets as a couple? Savings, investments, pensions, cars, equity in the house?

Think you will probably need to seek legal advice. If your DH is not abusive he doesn't have to leave but he may be willing to.

You probably need to start preparing to return to work in the future.

i would speak to CAB, women's aid and a solicitor, its been said many times b4 but most solicitors give a free 30 min session to people so write down all the most important questions and take them with you, also look online for websites that give advice on this sort of thing, a website that i found helpful on letting you know about any tax credits you may be entitled too was Turn 2 Us,

What ladylapsang says. You need to get some legal advice and then look at how to split things fairly. You wont maintain the same standard of living, but then neither will your husband, as you will be moving from sharing a home to running two separate ones. And I would start planning how you will earn in future as that's going to be necessary too. Tbh I think family and friends would only be a stop gap solution anyway, as not many people would have the space or inclination to share their home with an adult and two kids on a long term basis. So I don't think its the case that other people who leave their partner are able to rely on family or friends