Have been with dh for about 16 years. Ups and downs but always very secure relationship. 3 children. Now dh appears completely uninterested in any kind of "romantic couple type" behaviour. We have sex fairly often (1-2 a week) which is fine but he is uninterestd in going out together (always wants to take the kids) or even just cuddling up on the sofa. I've tried to explain how strongly I feel about this as I cannot see our relationship surviving indefinately like this - I feel like some kind of live in house keeper who also does sex :( rather than half a couple. He is currenly putting a fair amount of minor prssure on me to dress mor seductively for sex (posh undies etc) and I've said that I'm happy to get dressed up if he takes me out somewhere nice but he then goes on about how it is just a waste of money to go out to eat etc. Any suggestions? We talk a lot - at home and we get on very well adn the sex is fine - it is just that I cannot get him to understand that I need to be occasionally treated like an attractive woman and wined and dined a bit. He will not even cook for me at home, or even get a take away and light a couple of candles etc - says that it is all just pointless gloss and not important. I've started back at work now so am meetign other men and am really worried that I will end up having an affair because I am so desparate to just be made to feel special again and not be taken for granted. He does do lots of lovely things (like deice the car for me :) ) just nothing ever even slightly romantic (says that thigs like birthday cards are a waste of money etc).