Feel very cliched having to start this thread - I'd hoped I would never have MIL problems! BUT, here goes..
My MIL, Jan, comes a few times a month to lsee my now seven-month-old daughter and look after her for a few hours while I go out. Jan has always been great with my daughter and loves her very much. My daughter is a very happy, smiley baby and Jan has commented on this. Although I like Jan she can be very sensitive and take things very personally - to the point of being self-obsessed, to be honest. This hasn't been much of a problem before.
Today she came round and my daughter, who is teething, has a cold and was tired because she didn't have her morning nap as usual, cried a bit when I went out of the room. Jan took this personally. When I went to pick my daughter up Jan looked annoyed and said to my daughter "who's being a spoilt madam, crying until you get your way". I said light-heartedly "don't say that!" but I'm actually upset by it. I feel very strongly about not using negative language to or about my daughter - for a start, she's a baby for God's sake, and doesn't comprehend being naughty! For another thing, she was hardly trying to get her way. She just wanted some comfort from me. My parents have always spoken to me and about me in a very negative way (we're talking verbal abuse), and I am determined not to repeat the pattern.
I don't like my MIL speaking to my daughter like this, even if it was in part jest (which it didn't seem to be). My MIL has always been very protective over my nephew - her grandson - who at seven is badly behaved to the point where all of his schools and nursery and have complained about him. MY MIL will not except he is at fault in anyway, but yet she thinks it's OK to call my baby spoilt.
I'm tempted to mention it and clear the air, but the problem is she takes potential criticism extremely badly. Am I being over-sensitive? I'd welcome your thoughts.
MIL said something that upset me
TaiTai · 30/09/2005 00:12
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